Do you remember that friend you had in college? The one whose birthday was right around exams? And everybody really wanted to celebrate his birthday but was just too slammed to do it right, and you guys did something a few weeks later, when things had calmed down a bit? Wasn’t that nice?

Do you think we can do that with Jesus?

I mean, I want to celebrate The Birth Of Our Lord and all, but I’ll tell ya, it’s pretty inconvenient timing if you ask me. I mean, my mother-in-law’s birthday is the 19th, my brother is the 21st, my brother-in-law is the 26th, not to mention before-Christmas shopping, after-Christmas shopping, Santa visits, and passing Michael around from relative to relative like a tray of cakes. There’s just no time!

By Naomi Dunford - Dec 31, 2007 in Personal - 6 Comments
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Mom, Dad, and son, approximately five years old, are having a cozy evening shopping in Walmart, four days before Christmas. Son is quiet, well-behaved, and co-operative.

Mom: Oh, honey, those are the ones on rollback!
Dad: [silence]
Mom: Ooh, come look.
Dad: [silence]
Mom: They’re on rollback, honey!
Dad: [silence]
Mom: Come on, let’s go look. I’ll be quick, I promise.
Dad: I’m not getting in that line to buy a fucking bath mat.
Son: Yeah, Mummy. He’s not getting in that line to buy a fucking bath mat.

***

Overwhelmed? Freaking out? Borderline hysterical? Click here to get your own small business marketing plan. It’s not scary, I promise.

By Naomi Dunford - Dec 21, 2007 in Personal - 14 Comments
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One day, I will have my shit together. Today is not that day.

I got an email last night from a potential client. In their email, they asked for the phone number for my home business. It was 3 in the morning. I was in a bad mood. I also might have thought I was emailing someone I know far better than this lovely person who might have paid for my children’s orthodontia. My husband, say. My response?

“It’s on the website.”

That’s it. That’s what I said. That was the full body of my email.

Moral of the Story?

Never listen to anything I say ever again.

***

Overwhelmed? Freaking out? Borderline hysterical? Click here to get your own micro-business marketing plan. It’s not scary, I promise.

By Naomi Dunford - Dec 21, 2007 in Moral of the Story - 19 Comments
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Please read this one, guys. It’s important.

It would appear that people think I’m funny. Well, strangers think I’m funny. My family thinks I’m a pain in the ass. Maybe it’s like that for Seinfeld, too. I like to think so.

Anyway, the last few days have been exciting ones in IttyVille. Nataly from Work It, Mom! did an interview with me, and subsequently posted about me, and a bunch of other amazing women entrepreneurs and bloggers, on her own blog and on Huffington Post. Lylah did a post about me on her blog, as did Deb, and people are nominating me for Funniest Blog in the Performancing blog awards. Traffic’s up a smidgen. (That’s sarcasm, by the way. Thank God I paid my hosting this month.)

This is exciting stuff, and the pressure to perform is intense. Is this what men feel like? If so, on behalf of womankind, I apologize.

By Naomi Dunford - Dec 19, 2007 in Personal - 40 Comments
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The nice people over at Performancing have announced their call for nominations for the 2007 Blog Awards. Thank you to the ass-kicking people who have nominated IttyBiz so far. If you’d like to nominate – it doesn’t look like there’s voting, just nominating – click here to head on over and leave a comment. You have to log in to comment but if you’re into blogging, you should probably be a member there anyway.

Here are my nominations. There are 27 categories, but these are the only ones I feel I can speak with any level of intelligence on.

The Best Overall Blog – Zen Habits
The Most Influential Blogger – Seth’s Blog
The Best New Blog – IttyBiz
The Best Blog Community – Amalah
The Best Blogs You’ve Never Heard Of – Remarkable Communication and Shane And Peter
The Best Writing/Blogging Blog – Skelliewag
The Best Business/Money Blogs – The Simple Dollar
The Best Family and Parenting Blog – Amalah
The Funniest Blog – Dooce

By Naomi Dunford - Dec 18, 2007 in Home Business Blogging - 7 Comments
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Because you can read, you know what this post’s about. What you don’t know is that it’s a special post. This week, I’m going to do exactly what I’ve been doing every other week (read: snark and call it marketing advice) but we’re breaking it up because I’m crazy like that. All of my examples this week are going to feature Erin from Durtbagz. Why? Well, because she rocks. And I really wanted some of her bagz. So I bribed her. Or maybe she bribed me. Doesn’t matter. My point(s)? One, you’ll see some Erin for the next few days. Two, I accept bribes. Keep that in mind. Moving on.

The other day, we talked about branding. Some people left stuff in comments and other people emailed me to indicate that they didn’t understand the difference between branding and image. I could come up with my own topic or I could just give the people what they want. Therefore, I give you…

By Naomi Dunford - Dec 16, 2007 in Marketing School - 11 Comments
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Let’s play pretend.

Let’s pretend that you are taking me out on a date. (For my lovely female readers, this can be a “friend” date or you can pretend we’re lesbians. Doesn’t affect the story at all.) Because you’re a cheap bastard, you’re taking me to McDonald’s.

We get to the counter and I’m trying to decide between the Quarter Pounder with Cheese and the Big Mac. They both look pretty good, but it’s taking me a while to decide. I step out of the line because I don’t want to piss off the people behind me and I see, to my left, another menu.

“What’s this?” I ask the nearest 15-year-old employee.

“Oh, that’s the menu for Burger King. They’re our competitor. You can go there if you want. In fact, we actually have a driver on call. He’ll take you there, if you like. You can go right now! You don’t even have to come back.”

By Naomi Dunford - Dec 15, 2007 in Marketing School - 18 Comments
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Today, we’re going to talk about home business branding. Get a coffee, because I’ve got a lot to say.

Branding is a very big deal these days. We talk about personal branding and business branding. There are many definitions of the term, but here’s one I like so you don’t have to go searching for it on your own:

“A traditional advertising method used to elicit a latent response from a target based on cumulative impressions and positive reinforcement.” (from AdServerSolutions, via Google dictionary)

Conventionally, brands were used to identify cattle. They did not say the cow was a good cow or a bad cow. They did not convey the temperament of the cow. They just identified the cow.

That is branding.

People think that a brand is a logo.
People think a brand is a uniform.
People think a brand is a storefront, a package, a company car.

By Naomi Dunford - Dec 14, 2007 in Marketing School - 22 Comments
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[Note: The lovely Nataly and Lylah at Work It, Mom! interviewed me and my answers are up. You can check it out here. But you have to come back, though. That’s the rule.]

Something about your home business is weak. I know this. You know this. If it wasn’t weak, you wouldn’t be reading small business blogs on the internet. You’d be somewhere in the southern United States charging people to join your church.

Weakness is inherent. No strength exists without a corresponding weakness. The reverse is also true.

Trying to avoid weakness is like trying to avoid fear. It is an act of futility. Your job as a business owner, a freelancer, or frankly a human being is to spin your weaknesses into strengths.

By Naomi Dunford - Dec 13, 2007 in Marketing School - 14 Comments
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First off, I’d like to say that thanks to the awesomeness of IttyBiz readers, yesterday’s Remarkable Communication extravaganza resulted in a 2000% increase in Sonia’s traffic.

2000%

To those of you who have been paying attention, that’s double what I promised. Na na na na na na na. Thank you everybody. You rule.

Moving on to what you should be spending your money on. I have a super-yuck migraine right now so I’m going to make this quick. (Get the ebook when it comes out later. I’ll expand.)

Remember, yesterday’s mandate was that you should only be spending money on the things that people notice about your home business. No notice, no spend. Repeat it to yourself while you think about marketing ideas in the shower. Or maybe you don’t do that. Maybe that’s just me. Anyway.

By Naomi Dunford - Dec 12, 2007 in Marketing School - 13 Comments
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