Announcing the IttyBiz Gift Guide
So I got hit by a car and it screwed me up for a week. Now my family knows I’m not dead I can tell you guys. But that’s why I disappeared. I know there are those among you who are blogging from the ER but I am just not that dedicated.
Anyway, we like doing cool stuff for the holidays here at IttyBiz. If you were around last year, you’ll remember the trainwreck that was the holiday manifesto. Yeah, we’re not doing THAT again. (I still haven’t got that damn check, by the way.)
Instead, I was thinking that since y’all have IttyBiz’s and a lot of you sell consumer goods, I figured we’d do a gift guide. Everybody’s shopping for that holiday at the end of the year anyway, you may as well buy from cool people in the IttyBiz tribe instead of giving all your money to Wal-Mart. Cool, huh?
Want in? Here’s what you do.
Email Jamie at jamie@ittybiz.com telling him what you sell and why it’s cool. Do this before November 15th. Include your URL. Put “GIFT GUIDE” in the subject line. Do not expect a response ’cause the poor bastard is going to get SLAMMED.
When I was running this by my ill-focused focus group, three people asked where they should send their swag stuff. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO SEND ME SWAG STUFF!!!
But I figure that I can avoid a bunch of emails from people saying, “Where do I send the swag stuff?” by just putting the address on the internet. (Sorry Mom. But seriously, chill out. I’m listed, for God’s sake. They’d find me anyway.)
Any stuff you send, unless it’s custom, will be donated to the Rotholme Women’s Shelter because I spent a Christmas there once when Michael was little and they were really, really nice to us and Santa came and everything. We heart giving back and all that charitable shit.
The Very Short List of Rules
Don’t apply if you don’t sell stuff that would make good Christmas presents TO A NORMAL PERSON. Yes, we all know SEO School would make a fantastic present, but stuff like that is not making the list. My mother is co-ordinating this. (Sorry Mom. Yes, again.) If my beige-loving mother doesn’t think this would be at least a marginally reasonable Christmas gift, it’s not going on the list.
Don’t apply if you don’t ship internationally. Even if you bend people over on shipping charges, that’s fine. We’re used to it. But we have Australian readers and Japanese readers and Ukrainian readers and, um, CANADIAN readers and we have NO TIME for people who only ship domestically.
Don’t apply if your order-by date is before December 1st. I know this kicks a lot of people out, but we need to give the peeps a chance and I don’t want to deal with the angry emails from people who are like, “This person won’t let me buy!” We’re trying to do READERS a favor and some readers shop late and their money is just as good as the keeners who bought in July.
Tell your friends! If you don’t do consumer goods but your Aunt Mavis does, tell her. Tell your forum friends. Tell your mom. Whatever.
If you want to send stuff, send it to this address, care of my husband. This is because the post office guy thinks I’m a Nazi lesbian man-hater and doesn’t give me my packages simply because he hates me.
James Dunford
1-123 Wortley Road
London, Ontario, Canada
N6C 3P3
Get your applications in by November 15th and no, there are no exceptions and no, I don’t care if you were a missionary in Africa and had no access to the internet. I don’t care. But good for you for feeding the orphans anyway.