Because I Really, Really, Really Hate April Fools’ Day
When I was four years old, I had a crush on a boy named Forbes. (I don’t know why either. Let’s leave it alone, shall we?) We were in kindergarten together. I got early admittance into school, so he was my first experience with an older man.
We played with blocks a lot. We used to count them together, making little piles of red blocks and blue blocks and yellow blocks. It was fun.
Then one day, he held up a handful of blocks and asked me how many were in his hand.
“Three,” I say.
“Nope.”
“Uh, yeah!”
“Nope.”
“Fuck you!” (Yes, I swore then as much as I do now. My Dad was training me to be in the navy.)
He opened his hand, showing the three blocks I could see previously and revealing a fourth green block that I couldn’t.
“April Fools!” He laughed. I did not.
Now I do not like April Fools’ Day and I do not like the color green.
Because of this, I don’t do anything on April Fools’ Day. When I was in school, I would skip. When I used to work outside the house I would take the day off. Now that I run a home business, I do not leave my house, I do not watch anything but reruns, and I avoid all kinds of media.
I was not planning on blogging today, but I wrote a guest post for Michael Martine of Remarkablogger and it ran today. Thus, I will blog just long enough to share it with you. You should read it. It’s good. Next year I’m writing on the 2nd.
7 + 1 Things Rock Band Can Teach You About Business Blogging
A highlight:
“Because we don’t live in Rock Band Communist Utopia, some band members are better than others. My husband is a mean guitarist and vocalist, but neither one of us could drum our way out of a wet paper bag. If you base your guitar strumming on my drumming, you’ll be booed off stage before you can say ‘Blitzkrieg Bop.’
In blogging, in business, and especially when you combine the two, your esteemed colleagues will lead you off a cliff if you give them a chance. Don’t give them a chance.”
I’m going back to hanging out under a rock. Have a nice day.
***
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Next Post: When They Don’t Get The Joke
Thought you might like this…
http://www.crossdrivenlife.com/10-things-that-should-be-april-fools-but-arent/
I think the stupid freaking day should be outlawed. What really pisses me off are the stupid “funny” April Fools jokes people are posting. How about we unsubscribe from all of the bloggers who put up the stupid damn April Fools post that they are quiting.
I bet they would think twice next year about posting such crap. I know my RSS reader would not be so full on April Fools day next year.
I almost tricked my son into believing I had slept in and he’d be late for school, except it wasn’t a trick and I really did sleep in and we had to run all the way. Bless him, he saw it as a wonderful chance to do some parent/child exercise bonding thingy.
Luckily, I told my boss at my job that I needed to go part-time so I could focus on blog consulting LAST week, otherwise she wouldn’t have believed on top of me telling her that I was going to undergo gender reassignment surgery.
I am the most gigantic gullible chump on earth, so AFD trips me up all day. NPR has done some brilliant stuff for AFD and I always fall for it. Yay AFD, for making me even more insecure than I am the other 364 days a year.
There is some stunningly lame stuff being posted around, most of it makes me wince. One commenter somewhere called it “Unfunny Lie Day,” which I thought was a pretty good summary.
OTOH, paper.com sent me an email saying they’d merged with rock.com and scissors.com, which I thought was very charming.
@ Sonia - You know what’s funny (and I mean that) is that people with the best sense of humor are the ones who hate April Fool’s day.
Naomi, I hear you, I hear you. Work was “fun” today, all kinds of people who think they should have a show called Punk’d, but they are not Ashton Kutcher… not even close.
Anyway, I loved your post at Remarkablogger today - enjoy April 2nd…
Signed,
Brett/Brent/ “Naomi didn’t call me a starf*cker” ;)
I hate it too! But I guess I can’t remember a specific reason, like you do. Being tricked feels lame. Thankfully, I had the day off from work.
Enjoyed reading your guest post. Especially the “Play what you know” part.
@Grant Heh. That’s a great idea. “It’s time for me to move on…” Oh, Okay. Buhleted.
Yeah, a lot of the April Fools stuff is pretty tired. Youtube’s was actually pretty funny, though.
When I was in 1st grade, my best friend at the time kept telling me I had a fly on my head. I fell for it. Over and over again. All day long.
I’ve never been much of an April Fool’s Day fan either.
Guess I’d better not mention the missive I thought up…
I don’t hate it, just feel indifferent to it. I think it’s a weird concept and don’t feel a special need to participate. But I didn’t hide under a rock today… just went about my usual business. It is 10:15pm here now so I think I can safely conclude it has been an eventless April Fool’s Day.
traumatized since kindergarten huh? I’m sorry!
So what if you cuss, that’s why reading your stuff is so cool. It’s you!
Come on people, you must have loved Tim Ferriss’ joke and all the ensuing worship and death threats, right?
[...] didn’t post an April Fools’ post on my blog — well, I posted on the first of April, but it wasn’t a joke — because I’m not into it. A lot of people are, though, and the [...]
@ Everyone — True to my word, I hid under a rock yesterday, meaning I wasn’t reading or responding to comments. Today, however, I am, and thanks to everyone who came to leave their 2 cents. Figured it was best NOT to spend the entire day bah-humbugging my way around the blogosphere. (Why is “Bah-humbugging” a word, and not “blogosphere”?)
Naomi, Thanks for the excellent (2) articles. I appreciate your advice, because I am retarded when it comes to selling myself. I like the way your spirit shines through in your writing. E
@ Ellen — Yes. Retardedness regarding personal promotion. I was reading an article on BlogHer the other day that was talking about the same thing. 30-odd comments, and all of them talking about feeling icky in the act of self-promotion.
Glad you liked the pieces — thanks!
My daughter was practically begging all day yesterday for an April Fool’s joke to be played on her. My husband misjudged her ability to take a joke, though, telling her at 4 in the afternoon it was bedtime. Took a while to calm the tears from that one.
I just put her teddy bear in roller skates on top of her bed. Simple and designed only for a laugh.
@ Stephanie — THAT I love. Not “you’re a total idiot” or “hardyharhar the joke’s on you” — just plain silly and funny and fun. Perfectly delightful.
I think you might be referring to a BlogHer article that I wrote. Yes, self promoting is not easy for many women. I commented on BlogHer today and included a link to my own blog in the comment. I nearly had a heart attack when I did that. I guess I am self-promotion-challenged but I am definitely not alone.
@ Vered — Hey! The world gets smaller. It all makes sense. :-)
[...] (If you’ve been paying attention, you’ll remember that I hate green.) [...]