Comments on: Coffee Cup Copywriting http://ittybiz.com/coffee-cup-copywriting/ Marketing for Businesses Without Marketing Departments Fri, 30 Jul 2010 21:44:21 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=abc By: » Coffee Cup Copywriting ::: Aging Ink http://ittybiz.com/coffee-cup-copywriting/#comment-10316 » Coffee Cup Copywriting ::: Aging Ink Fri, 14 Aug 2009 00:53:00 +0000 http://ittybiz.com/?p=1644#comment-10316 [...] on writing subjective copy — subjective copy breeds mistrust; allow the user to come to subjective conclusions on their [...] [...] on writing subjective copy — subjective copy breeds mistrust; allow the user to come to subjective conclusions on their [...]

]]> By: pelicangirl http://ittybiz.com/coffee-cup-copywriting/#comment-10250 pelicangirl Mon, 10 Aug 2009 19:44:08 +0000 http://ittybiz.com/?p=1644#comment-10250 great post! my coffee bullshit filter is targeted to the word "gourmet." "gourmet" coffee (or insert other consumable here) just isn't, so i wish they'd stop trying to tell me that it is! great post! my coffee bullshit filter is targeted to the word “gourmet.” “gourmet” coffee (or insert other consumable here) just isn’t, so i wish they’d stop trying to tell me that it is!

]]> By: ina http://ittybiz.com/coffee-cup-copywriting/#comment-10215 ina Fri, 31 Jul 2009 04:33:11 +0000 http://ittybiz.com/?p=1644#comment-10215 Er...sorry about the double/revised post. Must have hit the return twice by mistake or something equally idiotic. Sorry guys. Er…sorry about the double/revised post. Must have hit the return twice by mistake or something equally idiotic.

Sorry guys.

]]> By: ina http://ittybiz.com/coffee-cup-copywriting/#comment-10214 ina Fri, 31 Jul 2009 04:32:01 +0000 http://ittybiz.com/?p=1644#comment-10214 This rant sounds very familiar/ I'm thinking of the hours and hours that one can spend telling fiction writers, "SHOW DON'T TELL!" ...and still end up getting stories that start, "He was handsome in a good looking way. He was rich and his suit was divine." And papers starting, "Since the dawn of mankind, humans have been wondering about great white whales." No, I wish I were kidding. Maybe all my D students ended up writing Mochaccino (or however the hell you spell it) marketing copy? ina, disheartened. This rant sounds very familiar/ I’m thinking of the hours and hours that one can spend telling fiction writers, “SHOW DON’T TELL!” …and still end up getting stories that start, “He was handsome in a good looking way. He was rich and his suit was divine.” And papers starting, “Since the dawn of mankind, humans have been wondering about great white whales.” No, I wish I were kidding.

Maybe all my D students ended up writing Mochaccino (or however the hell you spell it) marketing copy?

ina, disheartened.

]]> By: ina http://ittybiz.com/coffee-cup-copywriting/#comment-10213 ina Fri, 31 Jul 2009 04:30:47 +0000 http://ittybiz.com/?p=1644#comment-10213 This rant sounds very familiar; I'm thinking of the hours and hours that you can pour into fiction writing students' ears "SHOW DON'T TELL!" and still ending up with, "He was handsome in a good looking way. He was rich and his suit was divine." Maybe all my D students ended up writing Mochaccino (or however the hell you spell it) marketing copy? ina, disheartened. This rant sounds very familiar; I’m thinking of the hours and hours that you can pour into fiction writing students’ ears “SHOW DON’T TELL!” and still ending up with, “He was handsome in a good looking way. He was rich and his suit was divine.”

Maybe all my D students ended up writing Mochaccino (or however the hell you spell it) marketing copy?

ina, disheartened.

]]> By: Ann Strong http://ittybiz.com/coffee-cup-copywriting/#comment-10203 Ann Strong Tue, 28 Jul 2009 22:14:47 +0000 http://ittybiz.com/?p=1644#comment-10203 “Breathe and savour the pleasure of your favorite European coffee. Personalize your Mocaccino by adding a delicious flavoring or topping it with whipped cream…” Why do I need to be sold to after I've already purchased? WIIFM? What's in it for me? Make me laugh, give me a fun fact, make me think, give me a good cry . . . “Breathe and savour the pleasure of your favorite European coffee. Personalize your Mocaccino by adding a delicious flavoring or topping it with whipped cream…”

Why do I need to be sold to after I’ve already purchased?

WIIFM? What’s in it for me?

Make me laugh, give me a fun fact, make me think, give me a good cry . . .

]]> By: Stephanie http://ittybiz.com/coffee-cup-copywriting/#comment-10202 Stephanie Tue, 28 Jul 2009 15:24:44 +0000 http://ittybiz.com/?p=1644#comment-10202 Great article. My husband sent it to me and helped me rewrite a sales letter, using your advice. It's the same advice I've been given about writing academic papers. Great article. My husband sent it to me and helped me rewrite a sales letter, using your advice. It’s the same advice I’ve been given about writing academic papers.

]]> By: Judy Murdoch http://ittybiz.com/coffee-cup-copywriting/#comment-10200 Judy Murdoch Tue, 28 Jul 2009 00:11:52 +0000 http://ittybiz.com/?p=1644#comment-10200 This wouldn't be MickyD's copy by any chance would it. They've been pushing their upscale coffee drinks relentlessly just about everywhere. I remember in the olden days when a cappuccino was fancy if you added a little cinnamon on top. The drinks MickyD is pushing look like a concoction you'd get at Disney World. Much as the copy writing sucks I doubt any of us are in their target market. Strikes me more likely to be the Wal-Mart crowd. I used to do research on Suave Shampoo ad copy. It annoyed the crap out of me but it worked with the intended audience. Ya think? Or do you think they're going after a more sophisticated person? This wouldn’t be MickyD’s copy by any chance would it.

They’ve been pushing their upscale coffee drinks relentlessly just about everywhere.

I remember in the olden days when a cappuccino was fancy if you added a little cinnamon on top. The drinks MickyD is pushing look like a concoction you’d get at Disney World.

Much as the copy writing sucks I doubt any of us are in their target market. Strikes me more likely to be the Wal-Mart crowd.

I used to do research on Suave Shampoo ad copy. It annoyed the crap out of me but it worked with the intended audience.

Ya think? Or do you think they’re going after a more sophisticated person?

]]> By: Sonia Simone http://ittybiz.com/coffee-cup-copywriting/#comment-10199 Sonia Simone Mon, 27 Jul 2009 18:50:01 +0000 http://ittybiz.com/?p=1644#comment-10199 While I agree that "organic" and "all-natural" are used a lot, I don't think they're overused at all. People are looking for those words. But it's not about what I'm looking for or you're looking for. The real question is what words and messages are these particular customers looking for? What do they care about? As the divine Miss N points out, a story about the coffee being organic or all-natural or fair trade would be even better. Kate, that is a super genius point. Making it inconvenient for people to spend more money with you = Not So Smart. "Delicious" is what you do when think you've got one shot at a customer and you're terrified he won't get it. "Better not forget to tell him it's delicious, he might not figure that out on his own." Stories, relevant facts, interesting benefits, etc. are what we do when we have a relationship. Which any decent coffee shop has. It's all about who comes back again and again. While I agree that “organic” and “all-natural” are used a lot, I don’t think they’re overused at all. People are looking for those words. But it’s not about what I’m looking for or you’re looking for. The real question is what words and messages are these particular customers looking for? What do they care about?

As the divine Miss N points out, a story about the coffee being organic or all-natural or fair trade would be even better.

Kate, that is a super genius point. Making it inconvenient for people to spend more money with you = Not So Smart.

“Delicious” is what you do when think you’ve got one shot at a customer and you’re terrified he won’t get it. “Better not forget to tell him it’s delicious, he might not figure that out on his own.” Stories, relevant facts, interesting benefits, etc. are what we do when we have a relationship. Which any decent coffee shop has. It’s all about who comes back again and again.

]]> By: kate http://ittybiz.com/coffee-cup-copywriting/#comment-10197 kate Mon, 27 Jul 2009 17:18:44 +0000 http://ittybiz.com/?p=1644#comment-10197 You are 100000% correct (as usual!) Real world example (sorta): every time i go to a particular Starbucks there is a display shelf of 'stuff' that is placed where you wait for your coffee. EVERY TIME - I say to myself while waiting for my coffee 'ooh this is interesting" quickly followed by "hmm there is a line and I don't want to get back in line, I will get it next time" and guess how many times I have gone to that display shelf and purchased something? NEVER. This experience has successfully drilled into my head that no matter how enticing a product/pitch/whatever is and/or how much on sale it is, unless you pick the proper place in the cycle to tell people about it (make it easy to actually purchase it) people will not go out of their way to buy it. You are 100000% correct (as usual!)

Real world example (sorta): every time i go to a particular Starbucks there is a display shelf of ‘stuff’ that is placed where you wait for your coffee. EVERY TIME – I say to myself while waiting for my coffee ‘ooh this is interesting” quickly followed by “hmm there is a line and I don’t want to get back in line, I will get it next time” and guess how many times I have gone to that display shelf and purchased something? NEVER.

This experience has successfully drilled into my head that no matter how enticing a product/pitch/whatever is and/or how much on sale it is, unless you pick the proper place in the cycle to tell people about it (make it easy to actually purchase it) people will not go out of their way to buy it.

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