Mar
22
Help! Do We Need To Talk About Money?
I do not read Ariel Gore books because they are good. I mean, I’m sure they are good, but that’s not why I read them. I read them because I promised God I would.
When I was 18 and wildly unprepared for motherhood, I reached the (in hindsight, inevitable) place where the only reasonable option was to hand my baby to his father and spend the afternoon jumping in front of a high speed train. I found Ariel, did not jump in front of a train, and promised to buy every book she ever wrote from that point onwards.
The point of all this is to paint as accurate a portrait as possible of the pedestal on which I place her. And yes, that was a lot of Ps.
The book talks about happiness, and at one point, she hires a life coach. The coach does an exercise to determine Ariel’s values, and these are the ones that came up:
- her kids
- creative work
- relaxation
- relationships
- righteousness
- service
- spirituality
“I think it’s important to note something that’s glaringly missing from your field of values,” says the life coach. “Money.”
Ariel goes on to talk about this:
With the baby at home and my daughter in college, I’ve certainly been feeling the squeeze. Just to stay afloat — to avoid slipping ever deeper into debt — I needed to double my income. But every time I’ve made a move to increase my cash flow, all my nagging little beliefs about money started bobbing to the surface:
Money is the root of all evil. If I charge too much for my work, the people I really want to serve won’t be able to afford me. My work isn’t worth much, anyway. I get to do the work I love — writing and teaching and editing — what right do I have to demand to be paid? Hard labor is work. This isn’t work. Anyway, money is dirty. Good, spiritual people have no need for money. Why should I need it?
To fully understand how hard this hit me, you need to understand that this woman is one of my Shameless Fan Girl Crushes. Malcolm Gladwell? Meh. Ariel Gore? May I please hump your leg? Pretty please? Just a little bit? Because other than being totally fucking awesome in every visible way, Miss Teen Mama Extraordinaire got herself a $100,000 book deal WHILE ON WELFARE.
At the time, I was also a teenage mother on welfare and thought a hundred grand was an unholy sum of money and that the lovely Ariel had. it. made. (Ahh, the good old days.)
Anyway, this made me think of the retardedly popular project the Havinator and I worked on a while back, Self-Promotion for Wimps, in which we spent a substantial sum of time explaining to our students that yes, they DID have a constitutional right to earn a living wage. What fascinated me then, and it still fascinates me now, is that the participants in Self-Promotion for Wimps who succeeded did not do so because they understood, but because they trusted us.
Nobody came away from the class saying, “Oh, right! Duh! Silly me!” They came away saying, “I dunno, but Havi and Naomi haven’t lied to me so far…”
The part where you can help
I would like your feedback.
I like money. A lot.
As such, I’ve been more able than some to make more of it than I need. Add that both my parents and both sides of grandparents were entrepreneurs and you have a recipe for someone not entirely in touch with the thought processes and neuroses of normal people.
Don’t get me wrong. I have neuroses surrounding money. They just err on the side of petulance that I do not yet own a pink jet. And, no, I’m not exaggerating. I don’t really understand normal money drama and I’m concerned that maybe there’s a lot of it out there that I’m unaware of and therefore neglecting.
So if you (preferably lots and lots of you) could answer some or even one of the following questions — or just ramble inanely a bit about your money issues — I would be really grateful. (And yes, you can totally do so anonymously.)
Zee Questions
- Do you have these money issues?
- Do you have different money issues?
- Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
- Does money freak you the fuck out?
- Do you have messed up money history?
- Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Zee Other Questions
- Would you like us to talk about money more?
- Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
- Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
- Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
Thanks. Cause I’m concerned that there’s something the world could be helping you with that they’re not helping you with, which would be fundamentally uncool.
I am so totally with you on Ariel Gore. She is freaking awesome, and if I could be her when I grow up I would be seventeen kinds of happy.
Now, my answers:
* Do you have these money issues?
I don’t think so. But I could be wrong.
* Do you have different money issues?
My money issues are mostly about being a woman and a pleaser. I don’t want to possibly offend someone or have conflict, and money can lead to that.
* Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
No, I don’t believe that I could end up in that situation.
* Does money freak you the fuck out?
Not really.
* Do you have messed up money history?
Thankfully, no.
* Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Not utterly. Maybe a little bit. Mostly because with 2 little kids I can’t go pee by myself, so I don’t see where I’d find the time just now.
* Would you like us to talk about money more?
Yes, because even though I don’t have a lot of issues I like the reinforcement of the ideas.
* Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Sure.
* Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Absolutely. Like I said, reinforcement.
* Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
The Law of Attraction kind of chaps my hide. So while the potty-mouthed bit would rock, I can’t see actually participating.
Re: Ariel. I KNOW! And when I found out she had another baby I was like, thank fucking God. PLEASE make more of you. :)
How’s this for money issues: I fell into a career path that paid better than the alternatives, but never really loved it. Now that I’m totally fucking burned out on the grind, I’ve got a wife and kids and a mortgage and school tuition and responsibilities. I’d have to be a selfish bastard to risk our stability to do something else, wouldn’t I?
The fact that I work for a bank, which was acquired, and is currently being dismantled, has kind of made the decision for me. I’ve spent plenty of time over the last few years hating what I do, but being afraid to give up the paycheck. Now I’m working hard on making some lemonade.
I want to answer in detail later but I had this to say to Drew –
PREACH IT! Which means, Drew – I agree completely and – you said it.
Ah, yes. The burnout. One of the other not-nearly-talked-about-enough topics. I’m all for the Work Your Fucking Ass Off school of entrepreneurial thought, and I’m all for Gary Vaynerchuk’s hustle, but Jesus! Most of my readers would maim and kill for the guarantee of six uninterrupted hours of sleep at night. I don’t know where people are supposed to get all this hustle and grind.
A-fucking-men to that! You can have all the hustle and grind in the world, but you still have to eat and sleep. Honestly if I could get by without food I would. And what about mom entrepreneurs? (Present self). What about shuttling the kids around? Forget that – how ’bout just finding time to do the basics for the kids like FEED them? And I only have one and she’s 12 and I’m STILL challenged because there’s no one else to do the stuff she needs but me when she needs it. I see single childless entrepreneurs working 16 hour days but add a kid in and you just can’t. When are we gonna talk about that?
Thank you thank you thank you for that. I can’t be the only one out there worries that I’ll never move forward because I do need to sleep a little bit to make it throught the rigours of a day in the life of a self-employed mother of two. But I was starting to think so. Thank you.
Do you have money issues?
Does money freak you the fuck out?
YES. My issues are both practical and psychological in nature.
Customizing what Drew said, to my experience: I stumbled into a career path that appeared it might satisfy my need to be creative, and when I found out it wasn’t “as advertised,” I hated it almost instantly. I’ve been totally fucking burned out for over 7 years, but I’ve got a husband, a fucking expensive antidepressant prescription, a freshly-minted foreclosure, and I am about to have major surgery.
It’s painfully obvious that following the Proper Path of the Middle Class American has done nothing but make me miserable (and still wind up in financial trouble); yet I can’t shake the gripping fear that if I quit my “stable job” to pursue something that wouldn’t make me hate life every day; in addition to selfish, that would make me a *stupid* bitch.
I can’t even bring myself to use my real name, because I’m so afraid of getting fired!
Do you have messed up money history?
Until 2008, no. I did everything I was “supposed to do.” I got a Master’s Degree. I got a “real job.” I had excellent credit. Then I bought a house that the mortgage broker assured me I could afford. I couldn’t. Cue Foreclosure, and total tanking of credit, with Extreme Feelings of Dumbassery.
Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
YES YES YES. The idea of me making $50,000 a year, without sitting on my ass in an office for someone else, seems utterly laughable. The more I continue to sit on my ass for 8+ hours a day, the less able I become to work my ass off during the off-hours. I’m exhausted, dammit.
I am not a writer, an entrepreneur, a website designer, or even someone with any investing sense. I make art- old school, non-digital, not-easily-reproducible-and-sellable-at-cheap-prices art. There’s no fucking way it could work.
Would you like us to talk about money more?
That’s kinda why I’m here.
Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Yes.
Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Yes.
I hate that my comment is completely negative, but I’m still in this boat, it’s sinking, and I haven’t a clue what to do about it.
If it’s any consolation, I completely understand. (See below).
TheDagger
…and then I got laid off on April 1st.
SCREW YOU, UNIVERSE.
Zee Questions
Do you have these money issues?
- Oh, totally.
Do you have different money issues?
- I’m not sure that much different than the ones everyone else has.
Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
- I think I’ll do okay, but it would be nice not to ever worry about that happening.
Does money freak you the fuck out?
- Yes. I hate everything about money other than spending it.
Do you have messed up money history?
- I see-saw between being comfortable and being near poverty. At the moment, I’m comfortable. A few months ago, I was at rock bottom.
Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
- Yes.
Zee Other Questions
Would you like us to talk about money more?
- Yes.
Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
- Me personally, nah.
Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
- Me personally, nope.
Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
- That would be pure hilarity and I would gladly pay to hear it. :)
“I hate everything about money other than spending it.”
Nicely said, darling.
“I hate everything about money except spending it.”
Yeah, that. Otherwise, let’s see…
- Issues are more the bad organization variety, stemming from a really GOOD childhood, actually. We were comfortable, Mom has always been awesome at managing finances, and I never really had to learn.
- Due to never having been scared about money, even when I got laid off the cat-food-eating scenario never really occurred to me. (Plus I have some excellent friends and a HUGE family, which can be useful.)
- As an adult, I still want what I want when I want it. Sometimes that’s fine, sometimes I am stupid. My bills get paid, but I tend to carry more debt than is smart. Having to rob Peter to pay Paul pisses me off, even though I know it’s my own fault.
- I hate doing money stuff — getting taxes done, figuring out my expenses, budgeting, etc. And I don’t think just having more money will fix that. Have not yet found a system that I can keep my head around happily, though.
- Don’t need to escape a job I hate, which I am grateful for. However, I like doing stuff on the side, and just need to ramp up to do more. More money would be a good catalyst. Amusingly, in this crowd, talking about doing more freelance writing/editing makes me seem cliched, though in my outside world, I don’t know many others doing that.
- Value of more money to me would be mental comfort (more in RRSPs, savings, debt repayment), and keeping up with the Joneses, kinda. (My best friends make low six figures, and while I make more than enough to take care of myself, getting rid of the imbalance would be nice in terms of doing stuff we like to do.)
- Don’t need a Fuck You Account, but proper savings, an “It’s never gonna rain THIS hard” rainy day fund, and maybe a house fund (don’t desperately want a house, but I want dogs, and having grown up in the country I can’t bring myself to get a dog while I’m in an apartment) would be good. :)
• Do you have these money issues?
By “these” issues, you meant…?
• Do you have different money issues?
Sure do. I like to have it and spend it, and then I feel guilty about spending it. And the fact that PayPal money is like Monopoly money makes spending really easy – and skews my perception of the value of a dollar. “$1,000? Pfft, that’s nothing!” … Well, until I NEED that money, that is.
• Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
Been there. Or close enough. Vowed I’d never be there again.
• Does money freak you the fuck out?
Nah. I worry about it like everyone else, but it’s just money. Happiness is worth more.
• Do you have messed up money history?
Not that I’m aware of. I’ve had money troubles and I worked my way out of them. Now I’m smarter and more careful.
• Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Nope. Watch me go. I’ll be there soon.
Zee Other Questions
• Would you like us to talk about money more?
Sure.
• Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Heh. Go for it. I’d read that.
• Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Aren’t they one and the same?
• Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
Only if I get to travel to TO and hang out in tattoo parlors with you.
OMG, I forgot about the PayPal as Monopoly money issue. Which, when every damn dime you earn comes via PayPal, is some pretty dangerous shit.
I have money avoidance issues, far too much credit card debt, and while I would LOVE to be a squillionaire I cannot really imagine it ever happening.
The reason I booked the consulting session with you is to talk about money, how I can make some and still feel cool about it.
Darling, I could talk about that for hours! Much looking forward to it. We’ll make sure to get you properly scheduled and sorted.
My Story (Which is sort of money based)
In December, I quit my “real” job and went freelance. I did this mostly because I worked for a non-profit whose funding got cut and I didn’t feel like working more hours for my already poverty level pay. I started a company because I figured that even if I failed completely, I couldn’t possibly make less money than I did at my old grant writing job.
In the following months, I’ve been wildly successful by most statistical standards. And I still have trouble paying my bills some months (For example, this month sucked, I’m currently behind). I’ve been on Remarkablogger and a bunch of other big blogs, and the one thing I’ve learned is that there isn’t a foolproof solution to getting rich with an online business, no matter how good you are.
I work more now than I ever did at my old job, and I still have money issues. But I’m so proud that I’ve made it as a writer. I’m fantastic at my job, my clients love my work, and I’m proud of my business. Also, I get to work in my pajamas with my dog while drinking coffee and listening to loud music. You can’t beat that.
There’s money, and then there’s freedom. And at least at the beginning, freedom will mean less money.
In answer to the actual questions, yes, I would love to see more about money on here, because it freaks me out and I occasionally have nightmares about it and it’d just be nice to see that I’m not crazy/insane/totally awful at marketing.
Thanks for letting us talk about this stuff, Naomi. As a freelancer and a company owner, people don’t want to admit that they’re freaked out about money and terrified of becoming a cat food eating bag person. Which we all are, on some level. Well, maybe except you. :-)
There’s a tragically beautiful irony in there. Freedom means less money until one day money means more freedom. Or one day freedom means more money. Damn. It’s like a particularly harsh koan.
Money problems? Hell yeah! A lot of them come from moving in and out of jobs, quitting jobs to go back to school and some parental shit from depression-era immigrant parents, however, here’s my rub:
I can easily focus on the LACK OF MONEY, and put my focus on SAVING MONEY and PULLING IN THE BELT rather than focusing on MAKING MORE GODDAMN MONEY. What’s totally fucked up about this is that I’ve got great professional experience and should/could have the confidence to go out and get creative and find work that’s cool and serves others and uses my writing, editing and coaching skills and make a stinkin’ killing.
So that’s my focus in this stage of life. Don’t focus on SAVING money, focus on MAKING money.
I have to give back some messed up Depression-era mentality of money and take on my newfangled 21st Century 2.0 go-get-em view on money.
In short, don’t focus on saving money and whimpering about what’s not there and getting seduced by ingained gremlin creature who is hanging pictures of Self living homeless under a bridge; instead, focus on doing the good work and getting out and making money and continuing to live in handsome blue condo and continuing to build on life experiences.
That’s my 2c … see? There I go again!
Hmm. Yes. The saving money books seem to be about stinginess and saving your tinfoil, whereas the making money books seem to be written by dirtbags.
I think you might be onto something.
Bring it on, sister.
My money beliefs (sorry in advance to people WITH IT):
1. Only people who work 16 hours per day have it
2. Only selfish people have it
3. All people with it are Republicans
4. SUV drivers have it and they suck (unless they tote dogs or band equipment or kids)
5. I don’t want to work all the time to have it. I went into business for myself so I had flexibility and could follow my other dreams including work.
6. I guess I honestly don’t believe I ever will have it.
Because of bad choices in love and some serious health issues, I ain’t got it (and Law of Attraction says Don’t Say That!). I’m tired. Very tired. Of thinking. about it. all of the goddamned time.
Yes. If you could fix that, fast, it would be great.
Kelly
The Bad: I’ll tell you, in a nation with 51% income tax, another 13% sales tax, and social services where we pay for a whole lot more than we get, I became a lot more Republican after the monies came. This scares the living hell out of me.
The Good: I sure as shootin’ don’t work 16 hours a day. I have, sure. But not usually, and never now.
I love money
I want lots of it
I don’t believe in too much of it
I think it makes retarded people more retarded
I think it can be earned
I think I’ll buy an island someday.
1. Knowing the little I know about you, I have a feeling you’re well on your way.
2. Could you please make sure your island has a spot for me to park my jet?
1. That’s quite a compliment, I appreciate that.
2. You bet…you can part it right next to mine…I’ll even have your spot painted for ya.
Oh crap, looks like I’m first to start rambling (hoping by the time I’ve typed this someone else will have written something..)
Ok, money issues yes I have them. What are they precisely – if I knew that I’d have fixed them already!! I think a part of me believes that I’ll never really be rich (that and some bloody medium telling me so – did not help matters).
I know enough to know with that belief, I will always be struggling. I’ve worked on this issue a lot from common sense to self-help mumbo jumbo.
I need to know how to get past that magic figure that only my sub-conscious thinks I’m worth. Somewhere along the lines I must have gotten the idea in my head that it’s wrong for me to have a lot of money. And as for getting a load of money without doing a whole lot- I’d implode at the thought of that, even though part of me desires such a life!
You have the task of educating people past their fears of money (and the consequence) – out of the stronghold that their sub-conscious holds them in. That’s a big safety mechanism to mess with!
Yay, the slow typing paid off! ;o)
“I need to know how to get past that magic figure that only my sub-conscious thinks I’m worth.”
Yes. For me, it was $150,000. I couldn’t even say it out loud. Like, you know when you’re having one of those conversations about what you’d do if you won the lottery? And you know how at some point, somebody says, “I mean, this is stupid, because it’ll totally never happen”? I was like that with salary. I would blush. And stammer. To my fucking HUSBAND! I mean, it wasn’t like I was on NPR or something. But I thought my very loving husband would literally point and laugh if I even entertained the idea of making 150k.
The hilarious thing is that 140k seemed totally reasonable.
I am like you Naomi – no pink jet? Not fair! I don’t want to be rich, I want to be obscenely rich.
Do you have these money issues?
Just that I don’t have enough to be satisfied. I don’t want to “just get by”. I want to have a beautiful Kelly bag to go with every outfit (or pair of pjs in my case).
Do you have different money issues?
I too come from a family of entrepreneurs and the though of not making it, or making enough money to get the things I want (full time housekeeper) scares the shit out of me.
Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
No chance in hell.
Does money freak you the fuck out?
Not having money sure does.
Do you have messed up money history?
Kinda, I had some credit card issues when I was younger. Everyone in my family is comfortable to pretty damn comfortable.
Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
No. Not making it seems depressing.
Zee Other Questions
Would you like us to talk about money more?
Yes. I think it is an important subject to all ittybizes
Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Yes
Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Yes
Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
Hmmm don’t know, although the potty-mouthed part seems intriguing. I love to swear as much as the next person.
Maybe we could pitch in for fractional ownership on the jet. As long as you don’t mind pink. Because the pink is critical.
There was a time when I lived in Swiss Cottage in London in a shabby apartment and I honestly thought I was going to be that next bag lady outside Waitrose.
Can I make $1M/year? Of course I can, but I’d appreciate some more money talk yes because I ain’t no where near that yet… So yes, I like the more money talk suggestion.
My current money drama: coming up with the money needed to moved to Sweden… (we got out final yes today from the big bosses who decided the future of non swedes – so now it is serious…ouch)
Yes, get the money talk together asap… :)
* Do you have these money issues?
Wanting a pink jet and not having one yet? Not really… ;)
* Do you have different money issues?
Yes. I want money and feel bad for wanting it. I feel like the Objectively Correct way to live is As Simply As Possible, but… fuck it, yeah, I do want a personal yacht.
Beyond that… I have a LOT of trouble saying no to people I care about. So when I DO get money, and the people around me would really, really like to spend it… >_>
* Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
Well, bag guy, but yeah.
* Does money freak you the fuck out?
Jesus, yes. I have nightmares.
* Do you have messed up money history?
Oh yeah. Including but not limited to the State of California reporting me to credit agencies for child support they were illegally requiring me to pay BUT NOT INFORMING ME OF.
* Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Kind of, yeah. Hell, at the moment the idea of me making $1 a year seems a little silly…
Zee Other Questions
* Would you like us to talk about money more?
Yes, please.
* Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Yes, please.
* Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
A million times yes.
* Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
Unless you’re saying “the Law of Attraction is bullshit”, I think it’s a waste of your time, but hey, whatever floats your boat.
Yah, we need to talk about money!
I’m guessing that most people that come here (and are on your lists) are here because they’re Not making that much scratch. They see that you’re making it pretty well (Didn’t know it was “pink jet” well, but….) and you don’t come across as a scurvy scam weasel.
So, we like you and love that you got from Here to There. Even more, we want to know Exactly how we can get from Here to There, too.
I can clearly Imagine what it would be like to have 500K in the bank. But from where I am at, I can’t see the path. And, while nothing is impossible, it does seem pretty freakin’ improbable.
Zee answers to applicable questions:
I don’t have any Money is Dirty or Evil thoughts.
I do have messed up money history. Looking better now, but I am concerned about getting three boys into college 10 years from now. Why don’t they teach basic finances in schools?
I don’t not think there’s Any way I’ll end up as a bag lady. I’m sure that I will Always be able to “make it” but I would prefer to live on Interest and Passive Income.
Yes, talk about money more. (But don’t taunt us!)
I would really, Really like Practical Advice on creating a FYF.
Psuedo Law of Attraction seminar? Nah.
That’s my stuff. I hope a lot of people pitch in, but it’s a little awkward because of our whole cultural taboo about money. If you asked people to write about their weird sexual fetishes, you probably get more, and more honest, answers.
Cheers!
Toby
* Do you have these money issues?
Yes.
* Do you have different money issues?
I do what I need to do to make ends meet and have a lot of guilt and shoulds attached to how I do that. I have a story, don’t know whether its true or not – that if I made a lot more money, my perceived problems would be solved. I do know that the pressure would be eased a bit if I had more money coming in.
* Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
I used to imagine that. But you’re leaving out the very large refrigerator box. I drew windows and flower boxes on it with a sharpie. I lived under a bridge too.
* Does money freak you the fuck out?
It’s still a mystery sometimes. Making it, keeping it, where to direct it. It’s a big guessing game.
* Do you have messed up money history?
A little. I had older depression era parents who didn’t really talk much about money other than giving me an allowance. Dad collected Social Security and actually didn’t trust banks (understandable) He stashed his many $20 bills under couch cushions. I remember how they were fanned out perfectly.
* Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Not laughable. I have that fantasy all the time. A million dollar money fairy or tree in my back yard. Or a magic wallet that would automatically have $1000 in it every morning.
* Would you like us to talk about money more?
Yes please. Lots and lots.
* Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
I think that idea sounds really great.
* Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Oh my yes.
* Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
If there’s laughs while I learn – I’m in.
Hi! I’m a software engineer, making significantly over $100k a year. That seems relevant here. I read your stuff, but haven’t taken the plunge on starting my own little business. I keep getting closer, though.
> Do you have these money issues?
Some of them. More than I should. Mostly yes, I do.
I’ve gotten to “my work is worth lots of money.” I haven’t made it to “I deserve lots of money and people will madly rush to pay me when I make my work available for purchase.” Again, working on it.
> Do you have different money issues?
Yeah. I was raised around money, but by people who are not nearly as financially literate as you’d expect of rich people. I find money intimidating, but I feel like I shouldn’t. I feel like I should already know all this, but don’t. This is a lousy recipe for getting me to learn about it, it turns out.
> Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
I’m actually doing pretty well on things like retirement funds, and my wife is good at budgeting, and takes most of the money I bring home before I can do anything too stupid with it. I’m highly unlikely to retire to a cardboard box.
> Does money freak you the fuck out?
Sometimes? Money doesn’t really. I’ve gotten kinda blase about it. Me *getting* a lot of money for something other than a salary is still freak-me-out territory.
> Do you have messed up money history?
Sort of. I have a really marketable skill and enough arrogance to mostly get me by. So I’ve always made a lot of money, and I have relatively few expensive vices. So mostly, I’ve gotten by with lots of income and only basic financial literacy, which works better than it sounds. I’m aware that this isn’t a good solution for, like, 95% of everybody.
> Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Not laughable, but not terribly likely either. I see me founding a “win the lottery” software company as the most likely way that could happen, and I’d have to do it after my kids are significantly older. On the other hand, the idea of me making $250k-$300k per year seems entirely reasonable, though I couldn’t do it all with salary. I’m, like, halfway there now. I could imagine founding a very lucky side business and/or ittybiz that got me there, with a fair bit of luck and a lot of work.
I’d just have to get over some mental blocks between here and there.
> Would you like us to talk about money more?
Yes please.
> Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
That’d be nice.
> Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
I think so.
> Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
Not really. I actually took a hypnotherapy class awhile back, so I feel pretty confident in things like affirmations and whatnot. But potty-mouthed psychology of money stuff could be cool :-)
* Do you have these money issues?
Yes, to some extent but I am learning to kill them with a pitchfork.
* Do you have different money issues?
Yes, I need to fear debt more than I do.
* Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
That is a distinct possibility.
* Does money freak you the fuck out?
Some days yes, some days no. The only days money freaks me out is when my friends are paying me money for setting up their websites, consulting, product sales, etc. I have no problem taking money from strangers.
* Do you have messed up money history?
It is 50/50. I have some great influences in my life and some not so great influences.
* Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
No. I have a former professor that will send me check up e-mails every year or two to see if I have made my first million yet. I get pissed when I say I have not.
* Would you like us to talk about money more?
Hell yeah punk.
* Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Ditto.
* Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
I want you to go all out psychological warfare on creating a F You Fund.
* Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
It would be interesting, but I am not a LoA person. When someone starts talking LoA I start to shut down anymore. I want someone that will talk practical tactics for kicking money’s ass.
will have to come back later when not in a rush to answer questions, but for now it seems very important to let you know that right now I could totally hump your leg.
God, you rock.
OK, here goes:
* Do you have these money issues?
Yes, but my jet is blue
* Do you have different money issues?
I always believe I don’t have enough – in case I live to 110
* Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
Mmmmm, don’t think so – although I’ve had bad dreams similar to that, except I was a bag man (saving me from further psychotherapy)
* Does money freak you the fuck out?
Of course
* Do you have messed up money history?
Depends what “messed up” means. If you are asking if one time in my life I had zero in my bank account and was buying groceries with a Sears credit card to eat that week, the answer is yes.
* Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Until I actually do, yes.
* Would you like us to talk about money more?
Why not – since it does freak everyone out, the more we talk about it, the better.
* Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Bring it on – all advice welcome. Perhaps we can have lunch at SOBCon. :-)
* Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Yes. I think you really did put your finger on this little devil – we need it, we don’t really need it, we want it, we can’t have it, we might be able to have it, we have it in our reach, we hate it, we love it…etc.
* Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
Now THAT would be interesting!
All the best, my friend, and see ya in Chicago.
Terry
short answer: yes.
long answer: yyyeeeeeesssssss. and I want a Fuck You fund.
-Do you have these money issues?
God, yes. They’re irrational, I know this, but sometimes they sneak up and smack me around anyway. Hell, I’m fighting them off right now. I’m changing the whole direction of my career. I’m preparing to launch a new blog with my very own teleclasses/lectures and all can think of is, “Sure, Naomi charges this much, but her stuff is more important than mine. Besides, she’s Naomi for cryin’ out loud? Who the hell am I?”
-Do you have different money issues?
Yes, my sense of self-worth is tied up in my ability to earn an income. I lied about my age (I was 15) to get my first job and I worked steadily from that day until after I had my first kid (at age 29.) I’ve made almost nothing since I left the corporate world to raise my kids and when things are lean, the idea that I’m somehow not doing my share (also irrational, I know) eats at me.
-Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
I worry about being destitute in my old age. My husband’s retirement alone isn’t going to be enough to keep us from stealing Whisker’s nibbles, that’s for sure.
-Does money freak you the fuck out?
Only when I don’t have it. Ok, sometimes when I do have it and feel like I don’t deserve it. Yeah, I’m a rich tapestry of contradictory neuroses.
-Do you have messed up money history?
Yes. College students and credit cards don’t mix.
-Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
My initial goal is to make $1 thousand per month and some days even that scares the piss outta me. So, yeah.
-Would you like us to talk about money more?
Yes, please!
-Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Oh, I like the sound of that very much.
-Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Yes.
-Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
Hell, who wouldn’t?
*Do you have these money issues?
Yes.
*Do you have different money issues?
Spendthrift here. As soon as I get a little money flowing, the spending faucet turns on full blast. It’s like winning the lottery every month or so. I behave exactly like Shannon Doherty.
*Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
I trained in survival skills in the military, so if I really had to, I would simply eat the cat.
There’s no way that will happen. I have too many people around me who won’t let it happen.
*Does money freak you the fuck out?
Yes. No. Yes. I mean, No. Yes. What day is it?
*Do you have messed up money history?
Totally. I clearly remember throwing my wallet at the window when I was 17. For a long time I could not manage my money even if it meant going to debtor’s prison (they have free cable!).
I’m much better now, but like I said, I have spending issues.
*Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Nope. The first year I made a six-figure salary I was pretty sure I could do it again – plus more.
It’s those little *how* details that need work.
—
I know I need to create more products or get a whole lot better at selling the ones I already have. I can usually generate the cash I need when I get resourceful. The problem is that those amounts are like little band-aids, simple quick-fixes.
I’m getting there, but if I could turn those quick, resourceful little cash-generators into something more meaningful and valuable, I could probably get to that million.
Zee Questions
Do you have these money issues? Do you have different money issues?
Doesn’t seem like it. I have other money issues. I don’t fear having too much money, and don’t really fear the idea of making money. I definitely fear asking for it. I fear other people asking me for money I don’t have – that bill you totally forgot to pay, that sort of thing. That’s the stuff that wakes you up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat.
Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
Not even close. I have some of the best friends and family a girl could ever want. I will never be a bag lady so long as they are around to sustain me.
Here’s what I really fear: I fear being a drain on my closest friends. I fear failing them. I fear needing to sleep on their couch and eat their food. I fear telling my father that I need to borrow money, like I did when I was a teenager. I fear being thirty and calling up my Daddy to ask for money because I can’t think of any other way to get it done. I fear not being able to be an adult, and to have all my loved ones know that I am not capable of this basic part of life.
Does money freak you the fuck out?
Apparently. But more in a “what it means about me if I can’t make enough of it” sense, than money itself freaking me out. If I woke up to a million in my bank account tomorrow, I am pretty sure I would not be terrified. So long as the depositor left a note so I knew that the Bourne Identity wasn’t out to frame me or some shit.
Do you have messed up money history?
Not really. I have your standard bad decisions, living beyond my means, spending money on stupid things, that sort of stuff. Nothing crazy, though.
Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Yeeeees. I can see it for one year. If I busted my tail and got lucky in a bunch of ways and basically just nailed it, I could see making a million for one year. Making a million every year? I have more trouble with that concept. The idea of that much money being ordinary. Then again, I’d have trouble with the concept of living outdoors 24/7 for the rest of my life, too, and I could probably see doing it for a year. Any eternal major change is unfathomable.
Zee Other Questions
Would you like us to talk about money more?
I’d just like you to talk more. In my ear. In soothing dulcet tones. With lots of “fuck”s.
Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
I want to know all about anything called a Fuck You Fund.
Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Not sure what you mean by this. I’m inclined to say yes, because I like the shit that you do and I suspect I would also like this. But I don’t know how much of “don’t be scared of money” is really useful. Maybe the practical stuff might make it a little more approachable, and that’d kill two birds.
Two dead birds. Mm. It’s dinnertime.
Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
Your potty mouth, while legendary and deservedly, could not possibly make me believe in the Law of Attraction. However, if your potty mouth wants to hate on the Law of Attraction and explain why you have a better thing called the Law of Making Fucking Money, Bitches, then I am all for it.
What Tei said about Law of Attraction.
I’m thinking something catchy like The Law Of Unrepulsion. Like, you don’t need to attract it. You just need to stop kicking it in the face with your boot and then peeing on it.
Its face, not your boot. What kind of moron pees on their own boot?
I feel I cannot properly express the amount of love I feel for you right now. Let us just say that it is soiled with your wickedness. And a substance that is very probably urine.
Naomi…you Rock! I am sitting here LOL at the way you are describing your potty mouth LOA class. I recently did a class called the Bad-Ass Guide to LOA…How to Make the LOA Your Bitch.It was fun! and when it comes right down to it, the LOA is here to serve you…..
Zee Questions
* Do you have these money issues? Yes. Most definitely. “But I love it, so it’s not worth anything.” “But I’m not an expert.” “But no one will pay me!”
* Do you have different money issues? Keeping track of it. Budgeting. Fucking hell, I hate and am bad at budgeting.
* Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat? Actually, I know I won’t end up a bag lady, but I would like to believe I won’t always be living paycheck to paycheck, either.
* Does money freak you the fuck out? Yes. Oh, yes.
* Do you have messed up money history? For sure. Apparently, getting saved doesn’t work. And I don’t mean that in the Jesus sense.
* Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable? Totally and completely.
Zee Other Questions
* Would you like us to talk about money more? Yes!
* Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund? Sure — once I figure out what it is.
* Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund? Always.
* Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?) HELL TO THE YES. LoA mostly squicks me out because I’ve seen people think all they need to make money is will — and not, oh I don’t know, will and desire plus work and focus and hauling ass. Please give me a version of this that doesn’t suck!
Oh, man, do I have money issues.
I grew up constantly terrified of being homeless and hungry. We frequently had our water or electricity turned off, and people used to camp outside our front door trying to collect on bills. Grown men used to scream at me, day after day, to get my father to pay up.
As an adult I learned the hard way that it only takes one hospital visit, a roommate skipping town, and the brakes failing on your car to end up $10,000 in credit card debt in one fell swoop.
What with my fear of homelessness and my albatross of debt, I simply cannot fathom ever having enough money to live comfortably. I would like to get to that point–but it’s going to take some work.
Naomi, bring on the money talk.
Do you have these money issues?
– Very much yes, sigh.
Do you have different money issues?
– Oh, probably. I have a giant pile of money issues. Too bad it’s not actual money, that would help a lot!
Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
– Sometimes, yeah. Will paint for food. ;)
Does money freak you the fuck out?
– Oh hell yeah.
Do you have messed up money history?
– Oh HELL yeah. I have a messed up money present.
Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
– Very much so, holy crap.
Would you like us to talk about money more?
– Pretty please with cream and sugar!
Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
– Yeah, very much so.
Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
– Very Very much so.
Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
– I would like a potty-mouthed post from you about pretty much anything, so…
I also want to second what the person above said: My budget is already pretty lean and I’m tired of having guilt every time I want to do something really awesome like dine at a Food Network Star’s restaurant, and yet, I don’t want to follow the sleazebag trail to a giant pot of gold. And also that I really don’t want to create an info product empire, which leaves me out on a LOT of people’s otherwise awesome internet marketing advice. Will paint for food. Will not write ebooks for anything.
Zee Questions
* Do you have these money issues?
Yes. I don’t think I’m alone on this one … :)
* Do you have different money issues?
Yes. Mostly mental and mostly with regard to having been told it’s a flaw in my personal makeup that prevents me from having enough.
* Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
Close, but I’ll make sure my cats eat before I do, generally. They were expensive, you see.
* Does money freak you the fuck out?
Sometimes, when I think about not having the traditional IRA and such to fall back on down the road.
* Do you have messed up money history?
Yes, but not in the area of spending on thing not necessary.
* Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
HAHAHAHAHA!!! *wipes eyes* I’m sorry, what did you ask?
Zee Other Questions
* Would you like us to talk about money more?
I find all the info here helpful so bring it on!
* Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Yes. I have an odd lifestyle and need specific advice. I’m sure I’m not the only one.
* Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Never hurts.
* Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
F*CK YEAH.
Thanks for listening. Thanks for being.
Do you have these money issues?
I have had money ‘issues’ all my life—I’ve never had enough, sometimes not enough to eat well. Currently facing being evicted from my house, without enough money to pay rent in another place. Old age is looking very grim from here (and it’s close—I’m 63)
Do you have different money issues?
I’ve never felt that I deserve money, no matter how badly I need it, want it, whatever. I have many, many skills, and have rarely (never?) been paid what I’m worth.
Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
Better than average chance, you bet.
Does money freak you the fuck out?
When I have it I spend it before somebody (who?) can take it away from me. Yes, history here.
Do you have messed up money history?
Only that I’ve never earned enough to support myself except for 5 years of a job in my fifties. Very messed up.
Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
I do believe in fairies, I do, I do!
Would you like us to talk about money more?
yes
Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Definitely, definitely, even more definitely!
Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Anything that can get me housing that’s bigger than a box!
Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
Hasn’t worked so far, but I’m in if you’re pitching.
Zee Questions
I read that as ‘Zen Questions’ the first time around.
* Do you have these money issues?
Darling, my money issues have money issues!
* Do you have different money issues?
No, just the regular Starving Artist Mentality ones, I think.
* Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
Well I hope not because that stuff smells really bad! But yeah, I could see it.
* Does money freak you the fuck out?
Yep.
* Do you have messed up money history?
Yep.
* Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Insert hysterical laughter here. That would be another yes then.
Zee Other Questions
* Would you like us to talk about money more?
Yes, I’m working on this side of things at the moment so it would be helpful.
* Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Sure, but I warn you, I’m probably not even at that stage yet.
* Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Absolutely definitely yes, I’m pretty sure that I’m not going to sort out the practical side until I’ve untangled the emotional side.
* Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
I don’t like that Law Of Attraction stuff.
Well, I have some of those money issues. Like “does my work deserve this much money?” In fact, I might actually have “deserving” issues more than I have money issues.
I do not think I will starve, because I am super-cautious. But I do think that I have not successfully figured out how to use my cautiousness to make plan that will let me take risk. It finally occurred to me the other week that I could, you know, build up my ittybiz and save that money until I felt reasonably secure about my income and had enough of a cushion and then maybe it would not freak me out to quit my job! Amazing plan, no?
Messed up money history: YES. My mom can’t believe anything she can do can be worth money. So I’m actually improving. Also, I’ve watched a lot of people jump into entrepreneurship before they were really ready and then have a shitty few years. Also also, I have “but children are starving in Africa” angst.
Yes, the idea of me making a million dollars a year seems utterly laughable. I would be really excited to make 10% of that.
I would really really really like practical advice on the Fuck You Fund. I would also like the other kind, but I have a giant-ass toolbox of emotional and psychological tools
I would like you to do a potty-mouth law of attraction seminar, because I trust you not to get into the “and if you’re poor it’s your own damn fault” bullshit.
Maybe I’m not the right person to give feedback on your questions, because I have never had any big issues with money other than truly believing that if you’re healthy, not living in a war zone and know one or two other human beings on the planet earth, you can always find a way for money NOT to be an issue.
But the different comments started to trigger me. Money lovers. Money haters. Money spenders. Money makers. And all of them are entrepeneurs. All of them having a different relationship with (making) money. Fascinating.
So here’s my feedback. Just so you know there’s one more person who wants you to wright about money. And hopes to learn more about the entrepeneurial mind. And read your shit. Cause it makes my laugh.
1. Do you have these money issues?
2. Do you have different money issues?
No. No.
3. Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
No. But if I do, I’ll sell the cat food and make the cat I stole it from my business partner
4.Does money freak you the fuck out?
No. And I don’t know why it should. People can freak me out. My mother does once in a while. Companies and institutions. They can be freaky. But no, not the money. Money’s good.
5. Do you have messed up money history?
No. And that’s the only history that may keep on repeating itself.
6. Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
No. It seems utterly laughable if I don’t. I’m in it for the fun. Making money is fun. And having fun isn’t really that hard.
—–
1. Would you like us to talk about money more?
Yes. And help people love it. Love is good. Money is good. See, it’s a song. People remember songs.
2. Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Yes. Please wright as much as possible on the Fuck You Fund. Make it your number one on Google. It has such a lovely ring to it “Fuck You Fund”.
3. Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Number one on Google. Go for it. Yes.
4. Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
Yes. Everything potty-mouthed is good. You will make money with potty-mouthed. I will send it to you. Personaly.
Do you have these money issues?
- um…yup
Do you have different money issues?
- yup – I like to have it then I spend it then I freak out about not having enough then I have it then I spend it then I freak out (rinse, repeat, rinse, repeat)…
Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
– well, probably not, but I’ve been close and don’t want to be there ever again.
Does money freak you the fuck out?
– Sometimes, sure…well, most of the time…just about all of the time
Do you have messed up money history?
– Messed up enough that money still stresses me out and I still hate to answer the phone even though the bad people don’t call anymore
Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
– oh, TOTALLY – *rolling on the floor laughing*
Would you like us to talk about money more?
– yes, if it will help me learn how to have more and not be so freaked out all the time about it
Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Hell, yes
Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
– that too
Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
– potty mouthed, yes. LOA, not interested.
Well, it’s like this. Years ago, back when I was married, 6 months after we got married, my husband’s company folded, so his job was kaput. He didn’t manage to get another one for years and years. He started a business in the mean time, but he never made much money at it, and basically, for the next several years, we were convinced that we’d end up living in our cars within the next 6 months. We did manage to keep our townhouse, but we also racked up $38500 in credit card debt. Things finally turned around, we managed to pay off the debt, but we only did so by being absolute total misers.
Fast forward to today. I’ve been divorced for 5 years. I buy all my clothes in thrift shops. I hardly ever eat out. I have a decent place to live, which will actually be mine in 28 years. I’m making the most money I’ve ever made. And it’s not much. I quit driving years ago because I hated driving, and I’m happy to take the bus and walk everywhere, but it’s good that I don’t want a car, because there’s no way I could ever afford one. And I’ve been investing every extra dollar in my business, so I have hardly any savings.
I’d really like to do my art full time and ditch the crappy day job. But I’m scared of having to live in a cardboard box. If I don’t have a place to live, I also don’t have a dye studio, and then I’ll never make any money.
And I get really pissed off at other fiber artists who sell their work for so much less than it’s worth, because I want to make a living wage, damnit. I don’t need to be wealthy. But I want to make a living wage, and have enough so I don’t live in fear, and so I can afford things I need. If I figure out that I’d have to sell a handwoven scarf for $250 to make a living wage, and everyone else is selling handwoven scarves of that size for $40-70, wtf?!
Woo, here goes! I tell you, I’m feeling brave putting this out. This is like group therapy or somethin.
Zee Questions
Do you have these money issues?
-Sometimes, yes.
Do you have different money issues?
-I have a really hard time spending money. So much so that I sometimes skimp on things I need for myself. I like be generous with others, but I’m a miser when it comes to my own stuff. Working actively on fixing this though, I swear.
Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
-Rationally, I don’t ever see myself there. But, being in bad situations before and thinking I could get there again definitely freaks my lizard brain out.
Does money freak you the fuck out?
-Only my lizard brain.
Do you have messed up money history?
-Not really besides taking the frugality thing a little too far. Note to self: World will not fall apart if I don’t squeeze that very last bit of toothpaste out of the tube.
Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
-Surprisingly, no. I could see myself living comfortably some day for sure.
Zee Other Questions
Would you like us to talk about money more?
-Sure!
Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
-Not really, got that part under control, I think.
Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
-Yes, maam.
Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar?
-No on the LOA, lol. A regular seminar would be ok though.
I am a special case – I was born and raised in a wonderful country that I love to death but most of us from there have money issues. Awareness helps. Reading articles like this helps.
I just realized that money is not on my list of values also. Gotta put it there. I worked through most of the issues though, my main issue at this point is – I am not good at managing money. The idea of making a million doesn’t seem laughable though. And I’d LOVE any kind of advise related to creating the Fuck You Fund!
Dunno if I have money issues. Likely. I’m not at all like you. No-one in my family for 4 generations has ever owned or run a business (ship’s engineer, nurses, teachers, company accountant, academic, steel mills worker). Totally scary to think I may have to be he first to run a business in order to get enough time off to care for my kids. I can’t care for them if I work 7:30am-7:30pm (in practice, what any company I’ve worked for demands). But I need to work so the 4 of us get out of this one bed apartment before the kids hit puberty and want privacy.
* Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat? Yes, particularly as I’d like to spend my days on art/craft/design work. For which I’m not qualified.
* Does money freak you the fuck out? Yes, both having and not having it. But I’m more experienced in the later.
* Do you have messed up money history? Dunno. I’ve paid all the debts I have to.
* Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable? Yes. Also, the only people I’ve met making that type of money are divorced, never see their kids and are 2 days away from a heart attack.
Holy Crap, Yes!! I can’t say I have psychological money issues except that thoughts of getting more of it consume my day. Like many, my job is boring, not challenging and takes WAY too much time.
I have been spending my free time trying to create a Fuck You Fund (btw, the absolute best name I have ever heard for it) in various IM ways like adsense, ecommerce and being an affiliate. The tasks invloved can get mundane but at least I am doing them for me…I am not renting out my brain (and body) to the highest bidder I can find.
I am not really a rebel, except in maybe a kind of Johnny B. sort of way. Show me how to be a rebel and build a giant FUF!
If you are considering offering something that shows how to create an FUF while also fulfilling other values like family, kids, service, spirituality than by all means please do it. Money is just the means…freedom and happiness are the end.
Show me this and you will become my Ariel Gore.
Do you have these money issues?
No. Not that I can think of.
Do you have different money issues?
Well yeah! To make money doing what I love kinda deal? I spend a lot of personal development, but only on the things I think are worth it. Otherwise I’d return them. But yeah that’s where my money goes, the books, courses…
Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
Noooooooo….
Does money freak you the fuck out?
Sometimes. When I imagine I might not have enough!
Do you have messed up money history?
Nope, proud Asian here LOL!
Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Not at all! Although I don’t know how to get there yet.
Would you like us to talk about money more?
A bit more, not too much though =D
Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Don’t know wtheck this is, but must be something awesome so yes!
Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Some emotional/psychological advice would be great.
Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
Hmm not really!
Most of those money problems I don’t have (touch wood), a fortuitous combination of financially responsible upbringing and values and having a comfortable joint income. Oh, and a husband who does fear we are going to retire in a cardboard box, so we are socking a shitload away into savings.
My money issues, therefore, are more psychological than practical. As in: I know I am underpaid in my “real” job but you couldn’t pay me to ask for a raise (the irony). As in: I’d like to transform my little blog into an itty biz (I’ve got some ideas for information products), but I’m all kinds of stuck around pricing. It’s partly a “what is this thing worth?” problem, but mostly a “who do I think I am to charge for something I’ve created?” problem.
So there’s that.
You could totally write a book called The Fuck You Fund: Making Money Your Bitch.
To all those who think money is the root of all evil: If you think money is so evil, then gimme your fucking money! I’ll be more than happy to take the evil away from you. I mean it. And you don’t have to thank me for it.
Anyway, what’s a Fuck You Fund, Naomi?
Cheers~
Mark
Have enough money issues for you to talk about money more.
I need help in money department. So hard to charge much for my easy come talent.
May go broke feeding two cats, but I’m fairly secure. Working toward becoming definitely so.
I view money as a commodity; it doesn’t scare me. I love to buy low and sell high.
Could write a page, but short answer is yes, I have a messed up money history.
$1 million in my bank account isn’t laughable until I get serious, and wonder who I’m trying to kid.
l’d like for you to talk about money so I might catch your no nonsense attitude about it.
Call the fund what you like, I’ll listen.
Your parents and grandparents were entrepreneurs, so whether you call it emotional, psychological or crazy talk, it’s bound to have merit for those of us hoping to create our first million.
No thanks. I’ve heard it with law of attraction. That dollar bill I magic marked to $100,000 hasn’t brought any checks in the mail yet. Yeah, I know…but it was worth a try.
What? How did this happen? After meeting with my business coach today, I came home to click on not one, but two different blogs (Havi had the other one) that hit me right between the eyes about things I needed to hear, again, from someone else.
Thank you. (And I still think your new Twitter avatar is hawt!) The least I can do is answer…
Zee Questions
Q: Do you have these money issues?
A: Not the same ones you have.
Q: Do you have different money issues?
A: Do pigs wish they could fly when dropped out of an airplane at 15,000 feet? Yeah. I wish I could aspire to having the kinds of money issues you have.
Q: Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
A: That just isn’t going to happen.
Q: Does money freak you the fuck out?
A: Yes, but slightly less than not having money.
Q: Do you have messed up money history?
A: In that my family of origin didn’t talk about it? In that I never learned to manage it? In that I have never learned that I provide a valuable service to people and have the right to be compensated for it? Yes.
Q: Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
A: Yes.
Zee Other Questions
Q: Would you like us to talk about money more?
A: Yes.
Q: Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
A: Yes.
Q: Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
A: Yes.
Q: Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
A: Yes.
Money mindset is my new thing lately. There’s a hell of a lot of information about how to do more business. There needs to be more information about how to get your head on straight so you’ll actually do that stuff without shooting yourself in the foot.
p.s. Self Promotion for Wimps was lovely.
Do you have these money issues?
I’m not upset that I don’t own a pink jet, no.
Do you have different money issues?
Yes. Whenever I get a client I always worry that they’re going to go away. And I have trouble asking for what I deserve.
Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
It’s kind of in the back of my mind.
Does money freak you the fuck out?
I love money! Not making enough of it is what freaks me the fuck out!
Do you have messed up money history?
Yes… I grew up getting in trouble for ordering food that was too expensive even when I was told I could order anything I want. Therefore I make lists of things I want and do not buy any of them, until I lose it and splurge on other things I didn’t really need or even want as much.
Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Yes.
Would you like us to talk about money more?
Sure!
Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Please!!
Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
That would be cool.
Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
I am a Naomi fan but not a LOA fan. Millions of people in third world countries can’t be struggling simply because they’re not manifesting their wealth properly…
* Do you have these money issues?
Yes. Immensely so. Part of it is I grew up poor and as such have an affinity for poor people and want to cater to them. The other part is that damn religion that was pounded into my head that “you should be humble and do everything in the world for free or almost free as your skills are gifts from God and to be selfish with them is a sin” (Word for word quote from my mother)
* Do you have different money issues?
Money issues up the wazoo here. I know a lot of people who started out with no money think to themselves “Fuck that, I’m going to grow up and have scads of money and do whatever I need to do it.” I’m the girl who got fired from Cutco because I couldn’t rationalize conning people into making them think they could afford the equivalent of a mortgage payment for knives.
* Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
It’s always in the back of my mind. My end goal, which includes world domination includes my hubby being a stay at home dad. Which means that everything is on my shoulders so a fail would be an epic fail.
* Does money freak you the fuck out?
Short answer, yes. Will we ever have enough, are we using it wisely, should we invest this extra money in the business or put it in savings, how much do we have to be making in order to expand into the next level of my plan?
* Do you have messed up money history?
Yeah. It should be illegal to give credit cards to 18 year olds. Plus my husband was a spoiled rotten brat growing up and used credit cards to keep up that lifestyle for quite a long time.
* Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
I want to say no. I KNOW I am completely capable of doing that and even more, I’m brilliant, creative, savvy and do good work, and bust my ass. But at this point I just have a hard time imagining myself at that level. I guess I’ve just been programmed that I’m “working class”, so to get myself out of that mindset is hard.
* Would you like us to talk about money more?
This is a marketing blog, not a finance blog (Although I think there is a severe need for a Naomi style Finance blog). I would like to see more articles on it as long as it doesnt’ become an all consuming thing.
* Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
* Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Yes. Yes I would.
* Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
I’m in for anything that involves foul language.
I also wanted to add that I’ve given away so much of my work, my talents, that the thought of people paying for it when I’ve been giving it away has really devalued it to myself.
•Do you have these money issues?
Nope. I’m kind of neutral when it comes to money. I don’t see it as a sign of success or failure – if I have lots, great – more shit I get to do. If it’s not – I just live within my means. There have been times when I have had very little money, but something would always come along.
•Do you have different money issues?
Probably that I don’t care about it either way really. Makes it difficult to exist within ‘normal’ society without it.
•Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
Not likely – unless I have a complete mental breakdown – besides, I’d still share with the cat. Maybe I could live with all the cats and they would hunt for me…..hmmm
•Does money freak you the fuck out?
People’s obsession with it, how much value people place on whether you have it or not – that freaks me the fuck out.
•Do you have messed up money history?
No, but like I said – I’ve never worried about it. Not that I haven’t had cause to – I just never have. Which is strange for someone who has anxiety! Love how the mind does/doesn’t work.
•Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Hell yeah. I actually did laugh out loud at the suggestion. I guess I don’t have qualifications to get a highly paid job, nor do I have any belief in myself that I have anything to contribute/market/sell that anyone would think worth paying for.
“Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?”
YES! I graduated from grad school six months ago and I have this inconsistent contract work which means that I’m living with my parents at age 27.
“Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?”
Just plain impossible, yeah. I’ve looked at salaries for most people in my field of interest and they seem to peak around the $100,000-$120,000 a year range. For me, I would like to be able to earn maybe $75,000-$100,000 a year without working 37.5 hours per week X 52 weeks.
“Would you like us to talk about money more?”
Absolutely! I tried to ask for a raise in my consulting gig a few months ago and it completely totally failed. I’m very angry at myself. I manage the money I do have well (basically no debt, solid credit history, I even have a little RRSP going!) but asking for more money from somebody? That’s some scary shit!
“Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?”
I don’t even know what you mean by this but I Want To Know More! Could you write a post/article on the “Fuck You Fund.” Do you have a fund? Was it when you got X amount of money in a bank account and then felt like you could finally turn down work that didn’t want to do? That’s kinda what I think you mean, but I’d love to know more about this.
“Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?”
You bet.
Anything about making money would be awesome. As a visual artist I am tired of working my ass off for free or to get into more debt. I started a business and feel the million could and should be mine, but with childcare costs and the mortgage and living from month to month… Let’s say it feels unattainable.
Money history- we bought a house based on what we could afford if we got grants/ more teaching/ successful ittybiz. Let’s just say after two years we had to bail to avoid foreclosure. Now, we live in the hood. It’s more affordable but our sense of entitlement hasn’t gone away. We work so much for so little, and I can’t reconcile reality with my dreams. I want my kids to grow up somewhere nice!
So any any advice would be great, you are the awesome
Just finished reading the Forbes list of billionaires around the world and then your article. I think I’m attracting money articles today. Now need to attract actual money.
Advice on money? yes please, foul-mouthed, potty-brained, pinks jets and all.
To all of zee questions, and the other zee questions, Naomi: YES!!! Except maybe that I can see myself making $1M if I get some help. :) Also, to the other zee questions: pretty please with a cherry on top, too!
Money! And the making thereof! Rah rah rah! Also meep! Run away! Yes, it’s the Mixed Feelings Show.
On your stern instructions (yeah, baby), Í’m reading that Dan Kennedy book about marketing to the affluent. And I’m half going dear god, I want to pull his smug, privileged, right-wing little head off and make him swallow it, and I’m half going hey, here’s how I could totally apply this to what I do, and with my third half I’m going ewwwwwwwww, if I ever made a cent using the advice in this book, everyone I know would rightly shun me and I’d hate myself forever, and with that elusive fourth half I’m going oh, stop being such a faux bohemian – you’re not going to bring capitalism to its knees by refusing to make any money.
So you see. Mixed.
Zee Questions
Do you have these money issues?
Yeah, basically. They come and go.
Do you have different money issues?
I have a healthy dose of old-world middle-class entitlement – firm expectation that I’ll get richer as I get older, basic sense that I deserve a Victorian house with a big garden, etc. – coupled with faux-boho distaste for and incomprehension of business as a concept.
Meanwhile, investment scares the ever-living fuck out of me.
I don’t feel I understand money, and I have a persistent belief that only those who understand money will ever make any. But in order to understand money I’d need to get close to it, which sets off the ick filters.
Working on it. Working on it.
Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
Absolutely not. Unusually for Ireland, I come from families who were solidly upper-middle-class 150 years ago. So I have this bedrock certainty that I’m insulated from the cat food.
Does money freak you the fuck out?
In spots.
Do you have messed up money history?
No, not particularly. I’m a saver, and an obsessive deferrer of gratification. I wish I had a better relationship with risk so that I could invest.
Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Yes. Please help.
Zee Other Questions
Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! (Although Law of Attraction talk kind of brings me out in hives.)
Right. Enough rambling. Carry on!
Lean,
You have summarized my relationship with money in a way I’ve never been able to. A soothing sense of community comes over me even beyond what I usually feel reading Naomi’s articulate and thoughtful posts and readers’ articulate and thoughtful replies.
Especially this from you:
I have a healthy dose of old-world middle-class entitlement – firm expectation that I’ll get richer as I get older, basic sense that I deserve a Victorian house with a big garden, etc. – coupled with faux-boho distaste for and incomprehension of business as a concept.
It’s good there’s a bunch of us here wanting to learn the same thing…
Zee Questions
* Do you have these money issues?
Yeah…not hard core, but issues but I’m not as comfortable with money as I’d like to be.
* Do you have different money issues?
different how? I hold back from creating things that can bring me money. It’s a discomfort I think.
* Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
No, I think I”m ok here. No cat food in the future.
* Does money freak you the fuck out?
Makes me anxious, but not to freak out stage…
* Do you have messed up money history?
I hold my own, but I could be more organized with money.
* Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
I see it as possible, but the steps to get there seem HUGE.
Zee Other Questions
* Would you like us to talk about money more?
Yes.
* Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Yeah, that would be cool.
* Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
YES. I think this is where I need the support most.
* Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
yeah, I’d pay good money for the potty-mouthed version :-)
Thanks, Naomi!
I love your site, and your blog. You have inspired me many times. This post is no exception, money is definitely an issue for me and I need to be told on a regular basis that I deserve to be paid for my work.
I also swear, a lot, so I appreciate potty mouth ladies every where. But….do have to use the word retardly? If you are using it to mean ‘arrested development’ cool, but you weren’t.
I know you can’t please everyone and we don’t want to get too politically correct but maybe this could be the one word you take out of your vocabulary?
Money issues….my biggest issue is that I have been noticing lately that I am holding the belief that other people do not have any money to give me. And boy has that been manifesting by people saying that they want what I am offering but they can not afford to work with me.
When I was growing up I always wanted lots of nice stuff…and to go fabulous places…and I was always told “You better marry a rich man if you want that.” My response…Fuck That ! I am going to have my own money!
And I always did.
I have had long chunks of time when I have been rolling in $$$, and barely working for it, and barely thinking of it.
It seems like in this moment,I am working very hard for it and not much is showing up?
The thing is I am thinking about money all the time now, noticing that it is not here. And that is the thing I know to be true…when i spend a lot of time thinking about money and how I do not have enough…that is my experience .
When I don’t think about and know that there is plenty…I have more than enough.
I would love to hear you talk about creating a Fuck You Fund.
Also about how to get money from everyone.
Rock on!
Leah
* Would you like us to talk about money more?
Yes please
* Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Immediately if not sooner
* Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Emotional advice – yes. But practical advice even more so. I have people (my own therapist and supervisor) who help me emotionally with the money stuff but they don’t do the practical stuff.
* Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
There’s no such thing as a law of attraction but I am willing to work hard and change some stuff I’m thinking and doing
Do you have these money issues?
Hell yes. About $225,000 in debt, mostly student loans. My wife and I both thought that getting graduate degrees would be worth the cost. I’ve been unemployed since last June, she just lost her job. We also just had our first baby who was premature, spent 3 weeks in the NICU, and now needs a surgery. So far her health insurance has been pretty good about covering the $100,000 in medical bills incurred. Hopefully, we can stay on her insurance with COBRA.
Do you have different money issues?
I hate spending money. My wife likes using her credit cards to take us on trips, even after I asked her not to.
Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag
lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
At the rate we’re going, that will be approximately July. My cat’s already glancing at me askew.
Does money freak you the fuck out?
Yes. I have to bring in at least $2700/mo to make debt payments. Then there’s the rent, food, a new baby, etc. You could say I’m freaked the fuck out.
Do you have messed up money history?
Up until about 2003, yes. I’m much, much better since then. My wife, however, is not.
Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Not laughable. But when you’re this far behind the game, almost 40, exhausted, burned out, and not sure how you’re surviving past July….
Would you like us to talk about money more?
Sure.
Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
I’d call it my “Fuck My Student Loan Debt Fund”, but sure. I can live just fine on $3000/mo, plus the debt payments.
Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
A little perspective would help.
Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
I spent a decade studying Mysticism. Not sure I need it, but I guess it couldn’t hurt.
The money issues I have are:
1. First and foremost, just like Ariel, I’m worried that “If I charge too much for my work, the people I really want to serve won’t be able to afford me.” (My niche includes people looking for jobs… not exactly a get-rich niche, eh?)
2. I’m not hungry enough. I don’t have the Halbertesque “gun to my head” motivation to work my ass off to make more money with my IttyBiz, because I make a satisfactory income from my day job. And I’m basically lazy. I’ve lost the sense of urgency I had when I first jumped into the online world, back when it was exciting and new to me.
That being said, I really DO want to make more money cuz I love what it would bring — early retirement from my job, which would then give me more time to help the people mentioned in #1. Geeze, I just need to get off my ass and put all the stuff I’ve accumulated (including Online Business School) to work!
Can you give me a virtual slap upside the head? :-)
Do I have money issues? I don’t know, but now that I have a web shop I sure as heck think about it all the time. And marketing, and stuff like that, that I hated to think about before. (Recent thoughts: http://satsumaart.wordpress.com/2010/03/22/why-marketing-makes-me-uncomfortable/)
But I don’t have money fear. I grew up well provided for (thanks to my immigrant parents’ many sacrifices), my husband was raised the same way (thanks to HIS immigrant parents’ sacrifices), he’s always had job stability and he’s really good about saving and investing. So I’ve never had bag lady nightmares… which may make me a less driven businessperson, it’s true.
But I’d love to hear you talk more about money! :)
The Soul of Money is a huge resource for this kind of thing.
read the book,
buy it used, go to a workshop, whatever.
http://www.soulofmoney.org/
Eastern Europe (Hugary is Central Europe offcially, but that’s just the PR). Post-communism. Still. It’s in hour fucking DNA I guess.
* Do you have these money issues? Absolutely.
* Do you have different money issues? Single mom, helping my mother financially, making half the income that would get me by every month, utterly despising anything that has to do with employment (meaning: freelancer, even if I starve to death), a loan to be paid back from failed business. Smoikng when I can afford it…
* Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat? No. I’m somehow absolutely certain I’ll get rich.
* Does money freak you the fuck out? Only when I don’t have it. I have this mental disorder called “nomoneytis”: when I’m out of cash, I just freeze into a catathonic state.
* Do you have messed up money history? Multiple.
* Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable? No. It would feel pretty comfortable.
* Would you like us to talk about money more? Absolutely. You are my therapy whenever I feel like I’ll never make it. And I definitely need shit to be cleared up in me ‘ead re:money.
* Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund? WTF is that? Sounds good though :)
* Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund? Sure. See therapy above…
* Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? I’d love to. Only if it’s potty mouthed, practical and kicks me in the butt. And downloadable :).
Yes! Please! My money history is so extremely messed up it would enable a therapist to buy a pink jet. So much ickiness and screwedupness.
And I can’t stop thinking about how much fun it would be to have a “fuck you fund”… rather than a “have to go out and buy the kids shoes because they’re falling apart fund” or a “I have to bag my own groceries fund”.
Actually, I think I’ll make mine a “wow it sucks I can’t lift my hands because my diamonds are so big” fund… or a “you look so cool in that car with NO carseats in it fund”.
So dish. I’ll be reading.
Do you have money issues?
Ohmygoshyes.:
- Getting a job in is just what you have to do in this world—everyone has to work to earn a living. Unless you’re a lucky bastard who has inherited riches or a greedy one who has made them on the backs of the working poor.
- People won’t pay for the things I **really** enjoy doing.
- There are people who suffer so much more than me—what right do I have to complain that my job is *boring* when there are people starving and without roofs over their heads?
- It’s greedy and unspiritual to want more money than you need for a basic, simple, no-frills life.
- If I make more than I need for that basic, simple, no-frills life, it’s my duty to give or use it to benefit those worse off than I am.
- If I charge too much for my work, the people I really want to serve won’t be able to afford me. (just like what Ariel wrote.)
- The capitalist system we live in is based on greed. The “haves” just want more and more, without regard for who they’re hurting by this.
- Corporations are the root of all (well, a heckuva lot of) evil. The people in them are mostly good, as individuals. But the groupthink of the corporate mindset does huge harm and not very much good.
Oops, that’s verging into the political…better stop there.
Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
No, because I would never steal from a cat. But the bag lady part? Oohhhhh, yeah.
Does money freak you the fuck out?
Yep!
Do you have messed up money history?
Messed up in the “normal” lower-middle-class way. In that there was always enough for food, clothing, and the other necessities, but hardly ever for luxuries. And this was talked about around the dinner table. I was expected to get good grades so I could go to college (which my parents would support me through as much as they could, but it was **expensive** and I might need to work part-time through it), do well there so I could get a good job, and move up the ranks like a dutiful little wage slave. (Bitter much? Who, me?)
Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Pretty much so, yeah. Although I’m certainly open to the possibility.
Would you like us to talk about money more?
Please!
Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And you need to call it that for sure!!!!!!!!!!!!
Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Not really—I’m working on that stuff already.
Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
Hmm. Not sure. But if I’m EVER going to take a “Law of Attraction” seminar, I want it to be from you! :)
I’ll keep it short – I can answer yes to all the questions to one degree or another. Is ANYONE totally healthy about money?
I will only add that I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to attend a potty-mouthed law of attraction seminar, as they are the best kind. :-)
money is a fascinating subjuct, which informs practically every decision made on a daily basis.
it’s extremely value-laden, and psychologically revealing.
i love that you’re so open and shameless about your quest for money, naomi. i’m pretty frugal and definetely know and appreciate the value of a buck…don’t have too many issues.
i feel i’m worth the salary i earn, but that also comes from confidence and experience in my profession.
i would love more posts on $$.
I’m with Mary, I’ll keep it short, too. Suffice to say to Zee Other Questions:
Would you like us to talk about money more?
Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
My reply: Yes, yes, yes and yes.
AND, thank you for the introduction to Ariel Gore…. can’t believe I didn’t know her and her work until now. And I’m a Portland book geek! Sheesh.
xo
* Do you have these money issues? YES, i want more but also like sleep so if i could make more and still get sleep that would be the best.
* Do you have different money issues? yes, my husband thinks there is an endless supply. I seem to have a mental block against budgeting. (and/or helping someone else to stick to a budget)
* Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat? um no? I know i will be ok, i just want to float on a yacht instead of treading water.
* Does money freak you the fuck out? yes and no, seeing a negative and/or red associated to money freaks me out
* Do you have messed up money history? maybe? didn’t have any growing up. i tend to spend $100 at target but faint at the idea of spending $100 on say, a business class.
* Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable? nope, i rather like this idea :) i know it can/will happen, just not sure how…
* Would you like us to talk about money more? PLEASE
* Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund? YES PLEASE, PRETTY PRETTY PLEASE
* Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund? AGAIN WITH THE PLEASE
* Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?) sure why not? i would love to hear your take on it :)
I’ll try to keep this short.
*Do you have these money issues? YES! I feel like no matter how much time I put in at my job and how much time I take away from my kids while working my online store, I’m just digging my hole deeper and deeper and not getting anywhere.
*Do you have different money issues? YES! Like kate above, the hubby thinks that just because he gets paid on Friday, on Saturday he can go and spend 1/3 of his check on something that DOES NOT benefit anyone in the family but himself. (Hello – food and shelter cost money!)
*Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat? NO! Thankfully, I have a particularly large,close family that I know I can rely on if it becomes that bad!
*Does money freak you the fuck out? You are fucking-a right it does!
*Do you have a messed up money history? YES! I routinely rob Peter AND Paul to pay one bill or another and I am just not coordinated enough to juggle much longer!
*Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable? YEP! Although I would absolutely LOVE it if it happened!
*Would you like us to talk about money more? HELL YEAH!
*Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund? ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY!
*Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund? YEP, need that too!
*Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?) SURE! Bring it on!
First of all, I gotta disagree with her life coach. Money is NOT a value, in any way, shape or form. You can have a bunch of beliefs about money (often conflicting ones, like “Rich people have sold out” and “I want to be rich”) but believing that money is a value will screw you up.
The value of money, as people have said, is what it provides for you and what meaning you attach to that.
Okay, that rant out of the way, yes I have money problems, as I describe here – http://theconfidenceguyonline.com/2009/09/broke-piano-burning-barn/.
I know what my money problems and issues are (namely that I acted like a prick) and don’t let them make decisions for me any more.
That’s all.
I love Kelly Livesay, and I’ve never heard of her before. ;)
Of course I have to post anonymously; we have to be upbeat and perky and happy to ever hope to be online entrepreneurs. Never admit the snarl unless you already have a following and can be charmingly snarky, right? Besides, I am a bitch and not a mom (and don’t get me started on how the word “mompreneur” just makes me want to puke my inadequacy as a female all over the holiness that is motherhood), so it should be easy for me to make money, shouldn’t it?
Zee Questions:
* Do you have these money issues?
Oh hell yes.
* Do you have different money issues?
After a bout of disability for depression or two right at the right time in the stupid economy (laid off subsequently), I don’t even feel like I can GET an insulting job. I have a degree from a good university, 10 years’ experience in illustration, design, marketing and then 13 more in legal and executive assistance. And I am nothing. Looking at $10-12/hour jobs along with 900 20-year-olds and knowing I can’t wear the miniskirt that would get me a leg up where my experience won’t. People want references before they meet you! Like I am going to have a bunch of HR crapheads cold-calling my references!!
* Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
My cats are the only reason I fear living on the street. Me, I could handle. I couldn’t protect them well enough, so I must find a way to buy cat food!
* Does money freak you the fuck out?
The lack of it does.
* Do you have messed up money history?
Yep, but oddly it got much better on disability. I was less miserable not having to fake it at that job.
* Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
More wistful pipe dream. Another “should.”
Zee Other Questions:
* Would you like us to talk about money more?
If it inspires you.
* Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Yes, but I am cynical…hard to save a fund with nothing coming in. Gotta get that lucrative secretary gig first.
* Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Yes.
* Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
Fuck yeah.
Thank you for the opportunity to vent. I don’t hate moms, just hate having it rubbed in my face all the time. WashedUpOldHagPreneur doesn’t quite have the same ring to it, but maybe it’s time for another subculture…
@Bad Girl – Oh, hey, I could be a WashedUpOldHagPreneur too! Yep, I’m not a mom, never have been, never will be. I just want to get people to pay me enough to do my fiber art so I can quit the stupid day job. It makes me way too cranky.
WashedUpOldHagPreneurs unite!
I forgot to mention I love you too! Yes, let’s unite! Or untie (sounds more fiber-y). I want to make lovely little dolls and personal artifacts…and write a blog. I suppose vitriol could garner a certain audience, but I keep thinking I have to be positive…
;)
@Riin: I definitely fit the WashedUpOldHagPreneur description.
[fist pump]
I know that 35 isn’t considered “old” by a long shot, but I keep thinking, “I’m too damn old to give up everything I own and live in a box just so I can take a chance at not hating my source of income.”
@BadGirl: I *completely* feel you on the “I don’t have kids, never will, so shouldn’t I be doing BETTER financially?!?” thing…and how I’m supposed to always have sunshine coming outta my ass (hence the passive-aggressive anonymous posting on this comment thread). :P
Yay, I think three people definitely makes it a movement!
And I loved your response too – not totally negative (well, maybe I like it that way…), just REAL. I am just beginning to give myself permission to create art without a customer in mind, so you are an inspiration to me. I know, it would be nicer if I were a rich benefactor being inspired, but there we go…
WUOHpreneur!
Exactly! I feel like, hey, I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, I don’t have kids, I don’t have a car, I don’t even have a tv let alone cable, so how come I’m so damn poor?! I should have more money than the people who do all those things!
I try not to be too negative online, but sometimes it just doesn’t work. Especially when my migraines just WILL NOT GO AWAY, no matter what I do or don’t do, except when I’m on vacation and stay home gardening or dyeing for two weeks. Then, no migraines! This stupid migraine elimination diet is a farce. I really need to just quit my stupid job. Yes, I am cranky today. No sunshine from my ass.
Hi Sweet Pea (I’m older than your mum so yes, I can call you that!). Dosh… ah dontcha just love it?
I absolutely do not have issues regarding whether or not I deserve it; of course I deserve it!
And whilst I totally buy into the “taking responsibility”, “owning my situation”, and “choosing my response to all things” thing, I do find myself in a somewhat limiting financial independence, income stream generating kind of place.
So my question is how to make some lovely lucre as well as home schooling three out of my four babes, being a single parent living on the other side of the planet from family so no babysitting help, and keeping house (and let’s not underestimate the sheer volume of never ending work and time involved in that please!).
Since no one is queueing up to pay me for looking bloody amazing for my age, I gotsta make my million soon or be in deep doo doos. I have loads of ideas, but no time to do them!
Law of attraction? Not for me thanks but a little or a lot of the buggerdy fuck fuck is absolutely no problem, as you may remember from last year! ;o)
Show me the fuck off money!!!!!!!!
Well…lets see…61 year old male with a mental illness that makes him reclusive and semi-catatonic in social/business situations (but, I keep trying to push my comfort zone). Been through two bankruptcies, three failed business start-ups, never held a job for more than 5 years without “having” to find something else, three marriages, two divorces and a separation.
Currently: Inherited a small stipend that just covers the mortgage on my little acre of desert, hoping Spring will come soon so I can shut off the propane till I can afford to catch up on the bill. Working with social support agencies to keep electricity, phone and water on. Starting a new blog that I hope will show some profit by the late summer. Constantly battling the inner demons – (lizard brain).
The possibility of being the mad poet living under the bridge could happen.
$1M? Don’t know what I’d do with that much. – Hire an accountant, buy a couple of custom “choppers”, build a place on 40 acres a little farther from civilization, give a bunch to my wife, set up a trust fund for my granddaughter, a bit for charities…Yeah, I could spend it. So I could probably make it. I hate working for money, but freedom and some things are cool.
Yeah…I think I might have some $ issues.
An FU fund? Oh, Yeah, I’d have one just to say I did.
A kick-ass, potty mouthed Law of Un-repulsion seminar would be excellent!
LIFE IS AN ADVENTURE. THERE WILL BE DOLDRUMS AND HURRICANES ON THE JOURNEY, AND NO ONE GETS OUT ALIVE.
Hi Naomi I don’t know where my previous comment went. It is interesting that in his 1910 book The Science of Getting Rich, Wallace Wattles Starts with chapter 1 entitled ‘The Right To Be Rich’ Any of your flock who would likew a copy of a rewrite of this book in plain English just email me croz1@westnet.com.au and put SOGRIPE in the subjecty line.
If you have a discussion on Mindset and money count me in, I have been reaching this for many years.
Abundance to All
Croz
Hehe. Money talk. Yes please! :)
You have so many questions answered by some awesome people already here, so I’ll just go straight to my own issue – which is an echo of Ariel’s…
Oh, btw, I’m one of them there woowoo practitioners you refer to ;) Life coach energy healer :)
Here it is, my big’n: If I charge too much, the people who need me can’t afford me.
:)
*hugs!*
– Dawn
Do you have these money issues? Not really
Do you have different money issues? Definitely – namely that making money and managing money involves “work”. I associate “money” and “fun” only in the sense of what money can buy. Doesn’t sound so healthy to me
Do you have messed up money history? Yes – debt – which is it’s own special money drama
Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable? No, it seems do-able, but I’d sure like to have fun doing it. If it’s going to be *agony* then count me out. Hard I can stand, agony and forcing myself to do something I don’t love, well, let’s just say I’d rather be poor leading trail hikes in Sedona (which, incidentally, is no where even in the same universe of what I do to earn money now). Or maybe I’ll stow away in Chris Guillebeau’s luggage . . .
Would you like us to talk about money more? Yes, people, especially women and solo-preneurs, don’t take it out of the closet enough. Let’s get our shit on the table.
Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund? yes to the emotional or psychological stuff. Skip the investing 101 and go straight to getting past the money “baggage”.
Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?) FUCK YES! Don’t joke about it, I’d love it. It’s time.
Do you have these money issues?
Yes, some of them. I don’t think that money is inherently evil or dirty or nonspiritual — I NEED money and I like having it. But, I have a lot of issues surrounding whether I deserve to get paid for work I enjoy doing, especially since my work is arty and crafty and certainly not absolutely necessary in these tough times — I make jewelry, FFS, it’s not like I am feeding the needy or curing cancer! So what makes ME think that someone should be paying me for something I would do anyway, in a recession, no less? I grew up with the notion that work should be something hard and unpleasant and to be dreaded, because the reward comes in the paycheck and the benefits, and you suck it up and do what’s necessary for the sake of your family (or, if single, your roof over your head and your own solvency.) How dare I whine about not being happy in my job when there are people literally starving?
I also have some issues around actually ASKING for money, selling my stuff, closing the deal — all of the above make me feel sleazy and a little dishonest.
Do you have different money issues?
I am a very frugal person by nature. Because of that, it’s hard for me to fathom charging what my work is worth — after all, *I* wouldn’t pay that much for a pair of earrings (simply because I don’t spend money on myself, in general) so how can I justify charging someone else that much? And, I do value handmade and understand that it SHOULD cost more than cheap crap from Wal-mart. I’m just having a hard time translating that understanding to my own work.
I don’t know if this is a money issue specifically, but I also have a fair amount of shame around my recent realization that I am, quite frankly, not cut out for corporate work — I am incredibly burnt out and feel like I’ve been trying to shove a square peg into a round hole for my entire working life and it’s just. not. working. This sometimes makes me feel really crappy about myself — I am the primary breadwinner in my house and shouldn’t I be able to suck it up and deal with corporate BS in the interest of, you know, my partner and I not ending up foreclosed upon and homeless because I decided to go off on my own?
Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
Yes, and I am vegetarian so clearly that is not a viable plan for my old age!
Does money freak you the fuck out?
No, but debt does, and the possibility of screwing up the money I already have does.
Do you have messed up money history?
Not really, and I think that is part of my problem. I have excellent credit, have never been unemployed, have never been unable to make rent or pay bills, was taught by my parents how to manage money and credit — believe me, I know how fortunate I am. The thing is, it gets to be sort of like maintaining an A average in school — the longer you maintain that, the more you worry about some blip coming along and ruining your perfect record. (Once I got to college and got my first B, it was like I could finally breathe again — the sky didn’t fall and the pressure was now off.) I’ve never failed at money so I don’t know how to fail, if that makes sense. I think this also makes me less likely to take risks, like becoming an entrepreneur. Not that I wish bad money things had happened to me, but if I had had that experience and lived through it and came out the other side, I might have less of an irrational fear of becoming a bag lady.
Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Beyond laughable. My degree is in journalism and most days that I was in my college reporting classes, our professors went on and on about how none of us would ever make a living wage, so I started my working life with that having been drilled into my head for 4 years. I think this taught me to settle for painfully small salaries rather than ask for what I’m worth. My present day job (another, nonjournalism flavor of publishing) is in a field known for low pay, though I am earning a pretty good salary considering the field, and it’s not likely that I’ll see any more of a COL raise unless I go for a promotion that would make me miserable and even more stressed. I’ve always been told that the things I enjoy doing and am good at are not things that are going to make me money.
Would you like us to talk about money more?
Yes please!
Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Yes please!
Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Yes — specifically, how to stop feeling guilty about having such a fund, or wanting to have one. I was raised with the “nice girls are grateful for their stable, soul-sucking jobs that provide a regular paycheck. even if said job makes one miserable” mentality.
Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
Meh…. I tend to dislike Laws of Attraction-type things because of their implication that if something bad happens to you, it’s your fault. I’m sorry, but one can have the most positive attitude in the world but shit is still going to happen sometimes!
YES! I’m (proudly) frugal, so it’s really hard to imagine someone paying me what I’m worth. Simple but I don’t think i ever connected the dots quite like your comments do. Thank you!
Howdy, Naomi! I just recently discovered your website of awesome, and felt the need to answer these questions.
* Do you have these money issues?
Not really. I can always get more money!
* Do you have different money issues?
Yes. My boyfriend’s money issues. Le sigh.
* Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
My boyfriend puts it in another way: “We can head straight for our cardboard box.” My boyfriend, so clever. Har har.
* Does money freak you the fuck out?
Only when I think I have it and it turns out my wallet is empty and there’s the new Gorillaz CD waiting to be paid for.
* Do you have messed up money history?
Does that one time I had an overdraft count? Then no, I don’t.
* Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Yeah, it does. If I could make that kind of money with my writing of webcomic, I would totally go for it.
Zee Other Questions
* Would you like us to talk about money more?
Maybe. Will it be as clever as your other posts? How silly of me to ask, of course it will.
* Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
If only to know what a Fuck You Fund would contain, yes.
* Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
See above answer.
* Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
You mean there are other types of seminars? Sign me up.
Since I was going to answer ALL OF THEM with a Yes, I’ll just say
YES.
Please. :)
Money talk would be good. Very good. I have no money issues. Money and I are friends. But, I’d like to become lovers. Let’s talk more about the one million dollars.
I like Sidney. Sidney is wise.
Love the Law of Un-Repulsion!
Hey, just discovered you. Love you. Here are my thoughts on money.
Yes, I have money issues. I am a serial starter. I come up with a million great money making ideas. I get them just ready to launch and then I freak out and drop them. I don’t think I’m motivated by money. I don’t think I want to be rich but I always calculate – If I sell this many I’ll make this much. And I wonder if that de-motivates me.
I don’t think I’m afraid of money. I don’t think I don’t like money. My mom, though, always thinks people with bigger houses, better jobs, nicer clothes, etc. look down on her. She tries to hide her “imperfections” from them. I have a bigger house. My husband and I make more than her. She now hides things from me. I’m on the outside. It’s possible that that makes me afraid of succeeding.
I want enough to live comfortably, pay my bills on time, save enough so I don’t have to be afraid of the future and use the rest to help people who really need it.
My husband wants to hoard money. He wants to pay off the house and save every penny so when we’re 80 we can buy an RV. Fun. It stresses me out and makes me feel like we don’t have enough even though we have plenty.
I’m not really worried about being a cat food lady. I’ve been super poor before. I know I’ll be OK. I’m more afraid of not getting past my issues, money related or not, and having to spend another 6 months terrible, horrible, no good, very bad job.
Off to look up Ariel Gore….(do I lose cool points for having no idea who you’re talking about?)
And my answers:
* Do you have these money issues?
Totally. I mean, I’m ok with wanting it…it’s just the actual *having* it that seems….wrong, for a nice girl like me.
* Do you have different money issues?
Poverty. It sucks.
And it’s suckiness makes me sometimes kick-ass, sometimes scared shitless.
* Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
Not anymore, but I did when I started!
* Does money freak you the fuck out?
Usually, no. At 3 am when I realize I forgot to deposit that check and ohmygosh my rent check is going to clear….yes!
* Do you have messed up money history?
Yes. Not my own fault. But a childhood on food stamps and an unemployed for 5 years husband will do that to a girl.
* Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Not utterly. Much more possible now that I work for myself.
* Would you like us to talk about money more?
Sure! I want you talk about anything more!
*humps leg*
* Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Totally.
* Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Absolutely..
* Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
Probably not. I get all cranky when people tell me that thinking will make it so.
*smooches!*
•Do you have these money issues?
And MORE!
•Do you have different money issues?
Always!!! It should be endless and there should be a money tree.
•Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
No….I have full time employment. LOL
•Does money freak you the fuck out?
Concepts are understandable but still can’t fricken find the damn money tree.
•Do you have messed up money history?
I was good until my son wanted a car….Mommy will help you buy it. Son loses job. Mommy can’t help because she still can’t find the damn money tree. Man comes takes car. Son will pay when he gets a job but says, “there’s a recession going on, that’s why I can’t find a job.” (Poor baby has my DNA.)
•Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable? One of my co-workers tells me that “the first million will NOT be easy”; No shit! (
Zee Other Questions
•Would you like us to talk about money more?
Yes. I would like to know how much money you internet people make so I can have a perspective of sorts. I have etsy friends who are full time etsiers and I wonder what their annual income is too especially since that is the path I am most likely going to take. I know what I can “live” on and I wonder if it’s the SAME as what they are living on.
•Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
No. I need to learn self-discipline. You got any practical advice on that?
•Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
•Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?) Potty-mouthed Law of Attraction to Fricken Money Tree,,,in my own back yard. That would be a good seminar.
I am the bread winner in my family. My husband is a seasonal trucker and collecting a meager retirement….still can’t see the ends of the “making ends meet” rope. We met after I graduated from college. Back then, I got paid, went shopping for new clothes, went shopping for food and then paid my bills – in that order. My husband said that wasn’t the right way to go about it, so he’s taken care of the bills since then. I’ve learned a little since then but I still think there should be money available to me at all times – therefore, I am probably more messed up than you are!,,,,well maybe.
Zee Questions
Do you have these money issues?
Which ones? The wanting more money ones? Sure.
Do you have different money issues?
Not really.
Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
I’m pretty creative, I think I’ll always be able to find a way to eat human food.
Does money freak you the fuck out?
Nope.
Do you have messed up money history?
I sold my car to be able to quit my job and work for myself…but it all worked out.
Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Laughable only as in “Yay, I’m SO happy I’m making $1 million a year!” I can see that happening someday. But that isn’t a goal right now.
Zee Other Questions
Would you like us to talk about money more?
Yes, business is money. Makes sense.
Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Sure!
Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Okay.
Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
Potty-mouths make anything more fun but I probably wouldn’t be into it.
Zee Questions
* Do you have these money issues?
Which money issues? I’m lost. I certainly have money issues, but I’m not sure I have these ones. Not being smart, just saying.
* Do you have different money issues?
Maybe?
* Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
Can I be a cat lady who steals bag food from an actual bag? Okay, now I’m being smart.
* Does money freak you the fuck out?
I love money. I want lots of it and I want to roll in it. But mostly I want to buy things with it and have the security that it having a lot of money offers. So, when I’m feeling insecure, I ignore the money I don’t have. Not having money freaks me out. And due to that, I don’t have much money, even if I’m making $35 an hour contracting and working 40 hours a week (as I am).
* Do you have messed up money history?
Hooooo-boy. Yes. Probably started when I was a kid and mom would buy stuff, put it on the credit card and tell me that I can’t tell Dad. You have to be sneaky if you want to get good things.
Then college comes around and the only way I can go is if I get loans. And of course the credit card companies are there and you can get stuff with credit cards even if you don’t have the money, and you can pay it off later! Yay! But, you know, for someone who got a degree (eventually) in computer science, I’m not bright at all with money numbers. Percentage rate? I got the concept, not the reality.
So, there I am, spending money I don’t have and not thinking about how I’m going to have to pay it back, and not using it on smart things that will pay me back later.
And when I run out of that? I’m usually holding my hands over my ears, singing LALALALALA!! at the top of my lungs.
Well, long story short(er), I’ve gotten a bit better, in that I mostly spend what I make, I make monthly payments on time, and when I bounce, I have a recovery system that makes sure my bank account doesn’t melt (though that is running dangerously thin). And even after a few bail-outs from my parents, I have over $15k in credit card debt and I’ve not yet started to seriously implement a pay-down schedule.
* Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Yes? No? Does this include winning the lottery? That’s currently my back-up plan. And in my back up plan, it magically makes everything better, even though I suck at money.
Zee Other Questions
* Would you like us to talk about money more?
Sure!
* Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
What the fuck is a Fuck You Fund? I mean, yes. Whatever that is. Nothing better than sticking it to the [noun].
* Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Definitely.
* Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
I suggest introducing it with the audio sketch “Usage of the word Fuck” (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l_PkJ_4oEjc). Or, if you’re determined to also include some (or all, I say go for all) of the other potty words, use George Carlin’s “Seven Words You Can’t Say on TV” (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3_Nrp7cj_tM). IE, yes.
The other day, someone approached the booth where I was selling my art and after a bit of chit-chat asked me if there was anything that he could pray to Jesus about on my behalf (!) – hmmm, color me a tad surprised at this question (I live in Canada, we ain’t used to that sorta thing), but almost as quickly as I comprehended his words I imagined throwing an unfurling roll of toilet paper at this unsuspecting fellow’s head and thinking “you don’t know the half of it, honey”. This imaginary roll contained a seemingly unending list of my, um, “issues”, and completely envelops the guy. Thing was, I realized this “list” all had to do with money, earning it, keeping it. So, yes, yes and yes – a potty-mouthed, no bull money talk from Naomi = good.
Coming a little bit late to the party but what the hell, here’s my 2 cents:
Do you have these money issues?
- Oh god yes.
Do you have different money issues?
- Oh yeah. Mostly around not being allowed to make more
money. I don’t get it. But I just don’t seem to think I’m allowed to make more money than bare, struggling survival.
Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
- Heck yes. Features pretty high on my list of worries actually.
Does money freak you the fuck out?
- Generally – yes.
Do you have messed up money history?
- Yep. Definitely. Although my parents would never admit to it
Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
- Hahahahahahahahhaha.
Yes.
Would you like us to talk about money more?
-Pretty please?
Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
- Hells yes.
Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
- Yes, yes, yes.
Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
- If you swore and talked about Law of Attraction, I might just pay attention.
In case you may have missed it – yes, I’d it if you talked more about money. That would be amazing. :)
* Do you have these money issues?
Pretty much, though part of it is due to issues I can’t control (mostly my residency status disqualifying me from grants, loans, credit cards, welfare, Gov help, scholarships, etc etc). Also I do have external validation that if I charged any higher my core target market would not be able to afford it, and the people who could pay me don’t really share a lot of the same values or appreciate my style. (Funnily enough it’s the big names that try to get you to volunteer – the smaller names go out of their way to try to compensate you somehow, even a token amount!).
* Do you have different money issues?
Asides from bridging visas being a pain in the ass: my income’s so unpredictable that it can be hard to plan or dream or do anything that would help me in the long term because I can’t afford it short-term (I wish airlines had payment plans!). Right now my parents are doing a lot of the supporting, with my boyfriend helping out when times are dire and my freelance/temp work doesn’t fill in, but it would be a great boost to be able to support myself. I have been lucky in that gigs do tend to come just at the right time – I just wish they weren’t so wildly unpredictable!
* Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
I nearly was last year when I ran out of savings and still didn’t have regular income, and to top it off I had a personal emergency! But then I went overseas for my sis’s wedding and Dad gave me some money so that mitigated that a bit. But yeah I’ve spent some time being so afraid of homelessness.
* Does money freak you the fuck out?
The unpredictability and uncontrollable nature of it, yeah.
* Do you have messed up money history?
Hahahahaha yup! Basically: budgets, what’s that? Also I think I’m in the same boat as Lady Gaga – we look OK, but a lot of the money that would have gone to something else (like food or rent) goes to the art. It’s funny that I have more money than she does mainly because I am literally unable to be $300,000 in debt (no access to loans/credit).
* Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
That would probably involve more work than I would want! Even $40,000 is plenty; I’d just give the rest away or make a fund for others or something. I can’t even get an entry-level job, and my income’s like $20 every few days or so on average…so yeah.
* Would you like us to talk about money more?
Sure, if you have any practical insight.
* Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
If it wasn’t America-centric and didn’t involve access to things I can’t get, that’d be great!
* Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Yup, sure.
* Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
I am highly skeptical of LoA, so I wouldn’t go for it.
And oh! I was at a Reinvent Your Career expo today. Mostly colleges flogging their certificates (the very ones that stop me from getting most jobs because my experience doesn’t match up to them or something). It left me COLD.
* Do you have money issues?
More issues than a subscription, darlin. For other people and non-profits, I’m made of brilliant. For my own stuff? Brain farts.
The view from my boat is not pretty right now. Background info: I’m a doctoral candidate (heck yeah!) with so little money right now that the choice is find a job (which likely involves moving across the country for very little money if I can even get something) or increase the business for my ultra small on-location photography biz. Or both?
The point is, I have absolutely no money to continue paying for tuition at this point. I’ve sacrificed money, my life, and my health to get this far in the degree and I’m looking at not being able to continue and finish. That sound you hear would be shit hitting the fan.
* Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
I’m in the boonies part of The South. There’s a stronger chance I’ll end up living in the woods, dodging bullets from hunters. And running from deer. No, Bambi, no!
* Does money freak you the fuck out?
The chance of a panic attack has increased since beginning this questionnaire.
* Do you have messed up money history?
I am very happy to report that I’m not in debt. I’ve been living with my family for the last 6 years of grad school…but I’m not in debt.
* Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Sugar pie, my heart lies as an educator in art museums which involves very little pay (mmm…non-profits). And I’m an artist turned portrait/wedding photographer in a crappy economy when everyone’s Uncle Bob and 3rd cousin twice removed Nancy thinks they’re a photographer and can afford to charge 1/10th of my price. The idea puts me snack dab in the middle of Wonderland making hats.
But if I could make that kind of money I’d be able to do the things I love: being the bridge between artists and museum visitors, and documenting the disappearing landscape and abandoned rural locations. I feel as though there’s a huge hole in my heart because I’m not able to create on even a semi-regular basis. But, honestly, it would be nice to actually earn enough money to pay taxes and not just file them. And, you know, do that whole eating thing too.
* Would you like us to talk about money more?
HALP! I’m up for practical advice of any kind.
Here are my answers to Zee Questions:
Do you have these money issues? Yes
Do you have different money issues? Nope
Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat? I’m the one staring in compassion at the homeless person wondering if I should give them some money or hold onto it to prevent myself from coming one step closer to their situation.
Does money freak you the fuck out? Yup, see above.
Do you have messed up money history? It’s always been a choice between having enough money and having the job I love, probably based on the whole, if I love it how can I charge for it and, how could what I know possibly but worth that much thing.
Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable? Yes. But now I want the pink jet.
Zee Other Questions
Would you like us to talk about money more? Yes, yes, yes!
Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund? I don’t know what that is but I’m sure I want one.
Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund? Yep.
Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?) Yes, please. I believe it, but mine seems to be on standby.
Money issues – My husband and I have in the past reached the “where is our next meal coming from” level, but at this point in our life we can go a few years without starving. Our issues are of the “I want my retirement condo to be built of something more substantial than cardboard” variety.
My husband would like to retire now (at 56) but I’ve run the numbers and figure we need to work another 20 years at our present income. Well, his income, which is erratic. I’m self-employed and making nothing. So yeah, making a million a year is never-never land.
Money itself doesn’t freak me out. I have other fears, such as the fear I will end up working my ass off only to see my husband spend it all – on toys for himself. He doesn’t quite grasp the plan for the future part, although he’ll give it a nod. He’ll happily put money in our retirement funds for the tax break, but hates “tying it up.”
I desperately want a Fuck You Fund! I am so inspired by that term. My parents have money I might someday inherit – but they drive me crazy. I want to have enough to be able (if I ever had the balls) to tell them Fuck You and not care if I am disinherited.
But earning it is where I can use encouragement, that’s why I read your blog.
> Do you have these money issues?
Yes.
> Do you have different money issues?
Yes. My parents made a lower middle class income, but they had themselves grown up in poverty. The overriding, fundamental thing I learned about money is that money is for other people. I am not allowed to have any.
> Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
My life happens about $500 from this reality.
> Does money freak you the fuck out?
Less than it used to, but yes.
> Do you have messed up money history?
Yes.
> Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
Yes. I can easily picture it in my head, but then I have vivid dreams of flying, too.
> Would you like us to talk about money more?
Yes.
> Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
Yes I don’t even know what that is.
> Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
Yes, this would probably be more helpful.
> Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
Ugh, no, spare the bullshit.
Hi! Just found your blog – love it and subscribed.
1. Do you have these money issues?
Somewhat
2. Do you have different money issues?
Yes, I hold on to money for fear I won’t ever have any again! Also, the hubby and I have different money habits and that’s scary!
3. Do you believe there’s a not bad chance you’ll end up a bag lady eating cat food you stole from an actual cat?
My biggest fear in the world.
4. Does money freak you the fuck out?
Yep
5. Do you have messed up money history?
Actually, no. I’m debt free except for my house (thanks Dave Ramsey!)
6. Does the idea of YOU making $1 million a year seem utterly laughable?
As an IT professional, no (my dreaded former job). As an artist, inconceivable.
7. Would you like us to talk about money more?
I like your pricing-type posts.
8. Would you like practical advice on creating your Fuck You Fund?
You bet. (mine would be a garage/studio fund!)
9. Would you like more emotional or psychological advice on creating a Fuck You Fund?
I’m sure both would help.
10. Would you like a potty-mouthed Law of Attraction seminar? (Half joking, but who knows?)
Yep – fine with the potty mouth, Law of Attraction seems a bit hokey.
Thanks for you blog! Look forward to reading more!
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