Hey y’all.

I would like you to envision, for a moment, the human brain. You can envision an actual lump of grey flesh if you like, or you can just pretend it’s the cute little animated thing that goes in the chick’s head on the cover of Pace and Kyeli’s book. Whatever — doesn’t matter.

So. Do you have your picture of the brain ready in your head? Excellent.

Now envision a syringe. A really fucking big one. Like, super big. Science fiction movie big. Got it?

OK, now fill that syringe up as full as it’ll go. You can fill it with whatever you like, but if you don’t particularly care, make it gin. That’s what I’m using.

Is it full? Good. Now take the syringe and shove it into the brain and swiftly inject all the stuff into the brain.

Now you have an adequate picture of what my brain looks like.

I’m doing the Entrepreneur’s Telesummit. (Please go and see that yours truly is third on the bill, after Pam Slim and Michael Gerber but before Michael Port. I cannot even tell you how incredibly cool I feel right now.) So that’s kind of a thing.

Marketing 101 starts in four days. Yowza.

I’m doing this find your great work thing with one of my total heroes, Michael Bungay Stanier. He always makes me rethink, well, everything. (Michael, if you’re reading this, that’s a real pain in the ass, by the way. Just sayin’.)

And I’ve been reading. I’ve been reading Chris Guillebeau which is so incredibly great that it’s making my brain hurt with possibility. I’ve been reading Pace and Kyeli, both book and website. I’ve been going through Charlie’s archives.

Basically, my head is busy. And that’s where you come in.

I need guest posts. Preferably several of them. Preferably soon. If you’d like to submit, here are the rules:

1. I need full articles. While I would love to have the time to think about your pitch and whether or not I’d like it, I don’t. (Please see exploding brain analogy, above.)

2. They need to be about something relevant. Well, at least tangentially relevant. Preferably about business, marketing, or what to do when you’re brain is exploding. Then again, we haven’t done a moral of the story post in a while. You know what? The hell with it — write about whatever you want.

3. It has to make me laugh, cry, or think.

4. You don’t have to swear, but I’m not exactly going to turn you away for doing so.

5. It’s going to take me a while to get back to your email. Please prepare for this.

6. Please provide an author blurb. If your author blurb sucks, I will rewrite it. This is because I am in marketing and you are not.

7. Send your submission to naomi@ittybiz.com.

Thanks for your help, guys, and I look forward to reading what you’re sending in!