Feb
26
Scribe SEO: The Official Naomi Dunford From IttyBiz Position
In somewhat related news, I’m going to Florida! (The relatedness of this news will make itself apparent shortly.)
We’ve been getting a lot of questions on the IttyBiz cell phone hotline, as well as through every other medium imaginable, asking what we think of Scribe SEO. I was going to tell you when the hoopla surrounding it died down, probably when I got back from Florida.
Then the lovely Brian Clark — chief geek at Scribe HQ — got in touch to say, “Um, hello? Didn’t you say your people really wanted this? The fucking promotion ends today, jackass.” (It’s entirely possible he didn’t actually call me a jackass, but it makes for a better story.)
Because I am unable to read, I didn’t realize this before.
So now it’s today and he has a crazy deal. And if you’re going to come out and say “I’m an affiliate of this super awesome thing”, you may as well do it when that super awesome thing is on super awesome sale. Because if I ran this post Monday, when your $27 got you a little bit of stuff, instead of today when your $27 gets you lots and lots of stuff, you’d be really mad.
(In defense of the foregoing babble, we ran out of sugar like, three days ago, and Jamie isn’t back from Tim Horton’s yet. Therefore I have had no coffee and am very, very stupid.)
My point, and I do have one
Once upon a time, I wrote a fairly popular ebook about SEO. As such, I get a lot of questions about SEO. The most common question is some variation of “Thank you so much for your book. I’m so glad I understand the fundamentals. But what in hell’s tarnation do I do NOW?!?!”
Scribe is what you do now.
Five Reasons You Want Scribe SEO
Scribe SEO is a plugin for WordPress that you subscribe to on a monthly (but not a contract) basis. You write your post or page and then you click “Analyze”. Then it tells you all the stuff — EXACTLY the stuff — you have to do to improve your post to get thee lots and lots of search traffic.
1. It shows you EXACTLY how you’re going to appear in Google.
You know how it’s kind of like magic, what shows up in Google when you search for something? And you know how it would be REALLY, REALLY cool to know exactly what your search result is going to look like? Yeah, Scribe does that.
2. It shows you EXACTLY how to optimize your titles and headings, down to how many letters and words.
It will tell you how many words you want in your title and how many characters you want in your meta descriptions. And not in some vague, conceptual way. It will say something like, “Your title has two words. Put more words here, loser.” (Except without the “loser”. Although when we come out with the official IttyBiz licensed version, it will TOTALLY say “loser”.)
3. It tells you what to link to, how, and where.
You know how I tell you you’re supposed to link to your own content because Google hearts that kinda thing? And you know how you’re like, yeah, but, uh, how? And where? Scribe tells you. Exactly.
4. It tells you what you’ll rank for.
I ran one of my very best posts through Scribe and discovered I was ranking quite impressively for “blah blah blah”. This was very useful information for me because ranking for “blah blah blah” does not exactly help my business interests. I got to fix it so I could rank for something useful like “porn”.
5. It teaches you stuff.
It changes how you write. As you learn the rules, you start ranking better and better without trying. Which means you spend less time analyzing, and more time doing awesome shit. It’s kind of like grammar that way. When you’re little and trying to write a story, you have to spend so much time figuring out if you’re saying it right that you don’t get to spend much time saying it. But as you learn, it becomes natural. Scribe does that.
And one reason you want Scribe SEO today.
The normal price for the Super Crazy Fancy Pants Version, which includes 300 analyses a month, is $97. The normal price for the Teeny Tiny Version, which includes 30 analyses a month, is $27. If you buy today — like, TODAY — you can get the Super Crazy Fancy Pants Version for the price of the normal Teeny Tiny Version.
What that means in English
You can run it on all your back posts — and any posts on any other sites you might have — and never run out.
The lovely people at Scribe are very clear that you can cancel with one click, so if you don’t think it’s working out after the first little while, you’re not committed. So if you’re even remotely thinking this might be for you, you may as well do it today so you can run your back posts through it for supa cheap.
(ALSO IMPORTANT: You will notice my official testimonial on Scribe on the sales page. You can also see the extremely adorable picture of me taken by the awful photo machine at SXSW. Every time I wonder why I’m still getting carded at the liquor store, I look at this photo.)
That’s all I got. I really, really need a coffee.
Darnit, why do you have to make such good points. thanks.
Makes me feel so smart because I already have it and am using it. ;)
I’m testing it but wondering if I ever going to buy it..
Anyone else getting a vague error message when trying to sign up?
“It changes how you write. ” Hahaha! You just told me why I don’t ever want this. Yes, I know, I’m very weird.
Brian is going to KICK YOUR ASS for saying it’s a plugin instead of a software service that works via a plugin. The distinction is no skin off my back, but I just thought I’d toss in that he is going to KICK YOUR ASS.
I will bet you ten shiny loonies he will not kick my ass, and here’s why…
Everybody with eyes in their head knows I know as much about WordPress as you know about women. The fact that I even wrote this review in my own words and didn’t make him write it for me means:
1. He will not only not kick my ass, but
2. He’ll buy me a pretty new pair of Manolos for my birthday.
Are loonies and Manolos brands of chewing tobacco?
Kick your ass . . . purely with the power of his mind. Dude, I do not envy you.
Scribe actually is pretty cool tho. Really good for copywriters, lets you start doing “SEO Copywriting” without actually learning anything.
Power of his mind, indeed. Brown-noser.
Naomi,
You crack me up. I love your site. Gotta call you on one point, however. You said:
3. It tells you what to link to, how, and where.
You know how I tell you you’re supposed to link to your own content because Google hearts that kinda thing? And you know how you’re like, yeah, but, uh, how? And where? Scribe tells you. Exactly.
I’ve used Scribe a few times now and I don’t recall seeing this feature. So where “exactly” does it do this? ;-)
Other than that, great post.
Pat
I think you only need this service for 1 month – if you get the 300 evaluations option.
Don’t tell me you’ll forget what do to if you cancel the service after the first month.
We are freakishly easy to condition…..
I have loved scribe so far, but I really debate the value of keeping it after a month….
What do you think about that?
I’m not so sure we are all that “freakishly easy to condition”. We’re also lazy and avoid doing things that aren’t exactly fun. Scribe does have the benefit of keeping SEO right in your face, right where you live and breath – inside WordPress. Is that worth $27, $47, $97 a month? I’m not sure. I think it will be for some, but not for others. Hard to say right now. The other question is, will Scribe get better and become something more than it is today?
I posted some more of my thoughts in my Scribe SEO review. Let me know what you think, Scott.
I agree. Well, I agree until I stop agreeing.
Some people buy an hour of a life coach’s time and then dutifully apply what they’ve learned on their own.
Most people don’t.
I see the point you’re making made frequently, and a lot of would-be ittybiz owners decide not to create products or recurring programs for this very reason. But it’s a bit of a fallacy, thinking that other people feel X because we feel X, or even that they feel X because we believe it is theoretically possible for one to feel X.
Why do I have 12 tubes of mascara? I don’t know, but I do. It would have seemed pretty reasonable for a Chanel exec to say, “We don’t need to make a new mascara this season — everybody has way too much already.” Thank God they didn’t.
I had some very vocal complainers when I came out with SEO School saying that everything in the book was available online for free. Why wouldn’t people just research it if they wanted to know that badly? Well, people have their reasons. Same with Scribe.
In this case, I would imagine a lot of Scribe’s recurring customers will remain customers for insurance reasons. Yes, they’re smart enough to understand the precepts, but they’d rather pay the equivalent of a large pizza with delivery once a month to know that someone else has it covered for them.
hoping by now you found a vein & some coffee.
i want this i want this!
but i’m using-struggling-hating-learning expression engine instead of wordpress…..so will hope i can get a deal down the road.
Also use Expression Engine (EE) & would love Scribe addon!
Pfui! I see from my email that you posted this on Friday, 26 Feb 2010 08:14 AM PST. Most regrettably, it arrived in my email inbox from Feedburner or whomever on Saturday, February 27, 2010 7:09 AM — AFTER the end of the promotion, so my $27 would now get me a little bit of stuff, instead of yesterday when my $27 would have gotten me lots and lots of stuff. I’m not REALLY mad, but I am [ahem] ‘miffed’.
ACK! I was all set to buy it after your review, Naomi. And then I didn’t. For three reasons.
1. I just got your post in my inbox a few minutes ago. But it’s dated the 26th and so the offer you mentioned that provided the Advanced version for $27 is already expired!
But that’s ok, I was still considering getting the Starter version for one month to see if I like it.
2. I landed on the page you linked to all set to buy. I didn’t want to “learn more”. I didn’t want to “take a tour”. I wanted to pony up the cash and get it. But there wasn’t a button for that. I had to go hunting amongst the other links on the site to figure out how to purchase.
But that’s ok, I’m pretty savvy. I figured it out.
3. I’d finally figured out where to pay and started to sign up then found out that I had to use a Credit Card. *sighs* 3 strikes and I’m out of there. I don’t want to give my Credit Card details. I’m online, why can’t I use Paypal?
And now I’m just annoyed and sad. :-( I wanted to give it a try but I don’t like having to jump through hoops for things. Maybe I’m lazy but I like online shopping to be simple with the ability to choose the payment option I prefer.
If it’s this complicated to buy how complicated is it to run?
Your post just arrived in my inbox @ 8:09am. I followed the link but there was no promotion or no where to get the big for the tiny. Reading all the comments – light is dawning — I guess the promo is over? Ah so….. have fun in florida. Glad you’re not heading to Chili where the earthquake/tsunami just hit…..
Bummer! I didn’t receive the announcement until this morning either (9:09am Atlantic Time).
I just received it this morning too. No sale prices when I went to the site. :(
I was all set to buy, had my cc in my hand even! But, then I read the above comments and realized 1. I don’t know which link to click on to get the deal price, and 2. Looks like the deal is now over anyway. (Just got the email this morning, by the way).
If they are able to extend the deal through the weekend, I think you’ll have a bunch more buyers, no?
:)
P.S. I was once a make-up artist and even I didn’t have 12 tubes of mascara! What do you do with the stuff, girl? ;)
I also didn’t receive this until today (which is Saturday). I NEVER get your blog (via e-mail) on the day you send them out. I always get them the day after. I have g-mail & live in the U.S.
I have written the Ninjas about this problem in the past & have not received a reply. Would really like to take advantage of your specials when they come out — I’ve lost out on the bargains before.
How do I get you a copy of your blog on the day that you send it?????????????????
The “next day blog delivery” thing is something that the ninjas could switch in Feedburner… I’ll bet it’s set to the default, which is (I believe) to send new posts out between 9-11 am. Since Naomi usually writes in the middle of the day, it’s not 9am again until the next day.
Publicize > Email Subscriptions > Delivery Options… I have mine set for 7pm.
Great post, Naomi, I appreciate your blog and think you are a darned good writer, but sometimes you just try too hard…
Late adopters like me aren’t gonna benefit from SEO and other stuff like that we just don’t understand nor want to.
Not at all. And you wanna know why? Cause every time you turn around, there’s a new kid in town, just like the old song.
Tech freaks are always trying to push and peddle the latest fad down your throat, but you know what?
I don’t think I wanna spend more time on this dang computer.
I wanna escape from “virtual reality” and spend more time in the actual reality of our natural world, but maybe that’s just me. Oh well, to each his/her own, as I say.
Some people are just not going to be receptive to fads because they keep on changing and nobody has the time to keep up.
So what if your business suffers? Who said life is only limited to the bottom-line? Surely, we have better things to do than buying and selling products or services?
And I have confidence(?) in my writing ability. I don’t want a computer teaching me tricks of my trade. Dis-embodied voices give me the creeps (“you have one voice mail message”) and SEO sends a chill up my spine…
I don’t know about you, but I would rather pursue hobbies…
Ah, time to shut this computer off, and get a life. Cheers.
I succumbed to the marketing, got in on the early offer and am learning loads through its application and use. Next step is to see how the results pan out.
Adrian
u r a hell of a writer. I really love your writing style, it is so very entertaining.
@Archan, I’m having trouble understanding why you’re reading a marketing blog. :)
Also, I think having 12 tubes of mascara is definitely weird. I, however, have 27 tubes of the pink lipstick. But that’s completely different.
Also I just felt like showing up in Naomi’s comments and calling her a hussy, because it’s been ages since I did that.
Ah, Sonia, how nice of you to respond. So professional.
To answer thy question, gentle maiden, I read marketing blogs only because sometimes my moronic tendencies get the better of my good(?) judgment.
I was also not aware Naomi produces a marketing blog. Why, is that what this is? My, my: shiver me timbers and a bottle of rum. Naomi is good at wearing a disguise, it seems. See, I always thought this blog was about feminism and shit like that…at least now I know what I am reading.
Also, commenting on blogs makes me feel like a real writer.
Plus, I feel like I am as handsome as Johnny Truant–my favorite blogger by far–who looks like James Dean.
(Happy to know Truant does not have to worry about groupies hounding him and screaming things like, “Johnny, I love you. Will you be the father of my children?”).
However, since I am a guy–as in, “all men are dawgs”–I would not know much about things like mascara, pink, lipstick, and other feminine hygiene products.
Even so, I look forward to the day when I can go up to my boss and complain about “hot flashes,” so I can return home and watch Friends on my bird-brained TV set.
Also, since I am a loser in real life–and life is really a bee-ach–I like to play pretend and live in a fool’s paradise. It suits me, since I have a lower IQ than Adam Sandler on drrrrugs.
I would never dream of calling Naomi a hussy, since Naomi is known to be mean-spirited–yes, she is that infamous–and would leave me for dead in Death Valley.
If I ever had the misfortune of making it back to what passes for civilization, Naomi would knock my teeth out before offering me a glass of water. Cheers to you, folks!
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