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If you want us to let you know when it opens up again, stick your information in the boxes down there and we’ll give you a heads up when we’re open for business. In the meantime, you can still scroll down and get the free sample call. Cause free shit is cool.

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Hi, there.

It’s me, Naomi. Thanks for stopping by, and welcome to the page that represents pretty much everything I’ve been doing with my spare time since we decided to move.

It’s kind of funny, seeing all that time and thought and occasional hysteria being reduced to this one page. And as I type it, it’s blank. There’s no crazy logo and no sexy buttons at the top… just me and a blank Word document. The whole house is quiet and I’m trying to put this whole all consuming project-mission thing into words.

Three days ago, I wrote a sales page. It was awesome. And then I walked away to make Play-Doh mashed potatoes, came back and the sales page was gone.

I thought really hard about trying to recreate it, and then I realized that its disappearance might be a sign that I was writing the wrong sales page.

So we’re not going with a sales page. I mean, it’s a sales page in that at the end, you can buy something. And there will probably be something later, when we have testimonials and stuff. But right now it’s just you and me, and I’ll just write you a letter because that’s a lot nicer.

If you’re reading this, you’ve been around for a while. I might not know your name yet, but I probably do. There’s a good chance we’ve exchanged at least a few emails, or maybe we’ve commented on each other’s blogs.

Because you’ve done this, because you’ve stuck around, I’ve been able to change the way I help people. I’ve been able to change the way I do business. I’ve been able to pack up my family and move to England and give my mom a job and basically live my dream.

And I’m really, really grateful for that.

Because of you, I’ve been able to set up this membership program. It exists to give affordable help to ittybiz owners who do not have the resources to launch a big, sexy marketing campaign. It exists to level the playing field so that the people who succeed aren’t just the ones with money.

There’s a new page on our site which has been getting quite a lot of traffic. It’s called the IttyBiz 1000, and it’s about the new IttyBiz mission. If you haven’t seen the page yet, here’s the important part:

Here at IttyBiz, we get a lot of mail. Like, a lot. And almost all of the email we get is awesome. We like it when people write with nice things, we like it when people alert us to embarrassingly vulgar typos, we like it when people send us links to cool stuff.

Then, one day, we got the best email of all. We got an email from a very nice woman who told us that her own ittybiz was going so well, she quit her job.

First we cried. Then we printed this email out and nailed it to the wall.

Over the next several months, as more and more emails like this one came in, we added more printouts to the quitter stack. It became a really impressive stack, and getting those emails was the best part of our job.

Then we had a crazy thought. What if we made getting these emails the only part of our job. What if we turned our secret mission — getting people out of the crazy ass rat race of doom and death — into our not-so-secret mission. What if we, you know, tried?

The IttyBiz 1000 was born.

The IttyBiz 1000 is a project in utero. It’s changing every day as we refine and add and change. But the core is the same:

We want to help 1000 people quit their jobs this year.

I want to give you every resource I have.

I want to teach you everything I know.

I want to help you break your chain.

We want you on our wall.

This membership club is the start of that. We’ve created an affordable, accessible way for you to have access to IttyBiz resources on your own time, on your own schedule.

Here’s what you get:

Weekly call-ins

Every week, we’re going to give you a lesson on a relevant, timely, critical business topic. It’s an hour, and it’s recorded so you can listen to it on your own time, or pick and choose the lessons you want to hear.

Weekly Q & A

Instead of simply integrating questions into the call time, we’ve set up a separate time right after the lesson where you can ask any question you like. We can talk about the lesson, we can talk about your tagline, we can talk about advertising strategies… whatever you want.

Free, impromptu consulting

Every week, I consult with somebody live, in the Q and A session, in real time. You get my experience and, if you want, the input of your fellow SpeakEasy members. Whatever your burning questions are, you can have them answered in your own personal half hour session.

Getting Shit Done

Every day, we’re going to send you a nice, simple thing you can do THAT VERY DAY to move your business forward. Not hard, not scary, but incredibly powerful. (We don’t call them “getting shit done”, though, in case you get your emails at work.)

A private peer-to-peer forum

If you like forums, we’ve got one. (If you hate forums, that’s cool. You don’t have to join in.) This is where you can sell the living shit out of your fellow SpeakEasy members network, network, network. You can ask business questions, you can pimp your stuff, you can just hang out, watercooler style.

You get discounts.

Sure, you’re going to get 25% off everything IttyBiz sells. But we’re in negotiations with a lot of other cool businesses to get you great prices on their stuff, too. Membership has it’s perks.

Semi-Frequently Asked Questions

When this program launched to my team of devoted guinea pigs, and here are the questions they asked:

I don’t have a day job. Is this just for people who work during the day?

No, no, no, no, no. It is for people who want to break their chains. Many of you are chained to day jobs, sure. But a lot of you are working every hour God sends in your existing business, but none of them are billable. A lot of you are scraping together a living but taking a vacation is completely laughable. Some of you live in a shitbox apartment you hate because you can’t afford the home you dream about.

They’re all chains, and that’s what we’re breaking.

I don’t have time to listen to all those phone calls!

Well, praise God for that. You have a life and a business and a family. You’re not exactly drowning in time, are you? You can listen to some calls in real time, you can listen to some of them by recording, you can completely ignore some of them.

Everybody is at a different stage in their business, and everybody has different skills. If you’re a great copywriter, don’t listen to the copywriting call. No big deal.

But I’m cheap! And broke! I feel weird paying for four calls and not listening to all of them.

I understand what you mean, but that’s kind of like refusing to go to a buffet because you can’t eat everything there. You’re not paying for four phone calls. You’re paying for some phone calls, some support, some tremendous networking opportunities, and some structured what the hell do I do now?

I don’t think I can commit to this forever.

Honey, do you think I’m going to be doing this when I’m 70? Quit whenever. No big deal. If your financial situation changes and you can’t afford this, then quit. You’re not in a contract.

Can I get a sample?

DUH! Here’s a call from last month. It’s split into the lesson and the Q&A, and both are available in MP3 and .WAV. I always recommend you get the .wav if you have the bandwidth to download it.

(To get the files, right click on the link you want and select “save link as” or “save target as”. Give it a name, let it download, and listen away. Apparently people like them for their iPod while commuting or cleaning.)

Aligning Your Business With Your Life Lesson, MP3
Aligning Your Business With Your Life Lesson, WAV
Q&A and consulting with Megan Morris from ThatIdeaBlueprintGirl.com, MP3
Q&A and consulting with Megan Morris from ThatIdeaBlueprintGirl.com, WAV

The Most Important Thing To Know

I know a lot of people are nervous about membership programs, and who can blame them? Having seen some of the shady people running programs like that, it’s no wonder people are concerned.

I want to tell you, there is no risk for you with this.

This is not a contract.

You don’t have to worry that I’m going to bill you forever and ever if this isn’t something you want.

First, that would be yucky. Second, you have far too many opportunities to trash me in public — becoming a scammy pants all of a sudden is probably not a smart move on my part.

If you would like to try it, try it. No commitment and no hassle and no yuck. Just you and me, giving it a shot together.

If you would like to be a part of the IttyBiz SpeakEasy Naomi Retainer Thingamajig, please sign up below.

Oh, wait! You’re still saying, “That’s lovely. How much is all this lunacy going to cost me?!”

$44 a month.

I’ll spare you the big chart saying that this is the equivalent of X number of coffees or DVDs or whatever. I think we can all live without that. If you don’t have the money, that’s OK. We don’t have room for everybody in the world, and we don’t want you to sign up and sort of be mad because you couldn’t really afford it. That would suck.

Basically, if you made it this far, you’re saying one of two things. You’re either saying “GOOD HOLY GOD, where do I sign up for this craziness before she changes her mind?” or you’re saying you’re not sure.

Second group, breathe, don’t freak out, and go away and think about it for a bit. We’re still friends. First group, get yourself in here.